Vampires! A Bundle of Bloodsuckers Read Free Page B

created such a vacuum with her sucking that, when she removed her mouth, blood arced from the ravaged holes, spraying all three of us, as well as the furniture. She repeated the suck-and-lick pattern a couple more times – a bloodsucking praying mantis feasting on her bug, saturating everything with the bright red liquid. He screamed, struggling to free himself from her rigid embrace. The two of them tipped backwards in the chair, and landed on the rug with a heavy thud. The fall disengaged her fangs from his neck, but the wounds continued to flow freely.
    I gasped and looked down at the blood splattered on my light blue suit. In the time it took me to shift my attention to my soiled attire, Yvonne had wrestled Falcon flat onto his back and was sitting on his chest, her purple dress hiked up around her hips, restraining his arms over his head. Red glistened everywhere.
    My mind spun. We’d never covered anything like this in grad school. I knew I should do something, but my brain had put out the “do not disturb” sign and gone on sabbatical. I considered kneeling down next to them, and launching into another therapy spiel, but there was so much flailing and yelling going on, my words would’ve been lost in the maelstrom. And, even though Devereux had promised to execute any vampire who harmed me, I knew better than to trust the self-control of frenzied blood drinkers.
     “Your blood tastes of fear, my well-endowed cocksman.” Yvonne grinned maniacally. “And I know why.”
    Falcon twisted and squirmed beneath her, making a completely futile effort to escape. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He sounded terrified – even more frightened than the situation seemed to call for. What was I missing?
    “Yvonne! Falcon!,” I bleated uselessly, inching closer.
    He finally freed one hand, and pushed at her shoulder, causing her to lose her balance. She retaliated by lunging at him, wrapping her fingers around his neck, and attempting to choke him. He put up a good fight, and the two of them started rolling across the floor. Directly into my legs.
    “Shit!” I cried as I went down hard on my ass, accompanied by the sound of my skirt ripping. I barely managed to shift my legs sideways to avoid being trampled. I speed-crawled toward my desk and made it as far as the end of the couch before noticing Falcon and Yvonne were on their feet again, lumbering toward my hiding place. I poked my head from behind the sofa and watched the blood-covered combatants grappling at the other end.
    Adrenaline surged through my body, preparing me for fight or flight, as I listened to the snarls and barking sounds emanating from their throats. These vampires were insane.
    Treating human crazies wasn’t bad enough. No, I had to put out the welcome mat for the demented children of the night.
    Yvonne screamed at him as they fought. “I found your stash of dead women, my lying, fornicating consort. Either you’re incredibly lazy, profoundly stupid or you have a true-death wish, because you’ve been hiding your kills in the same place for the last century. I’m betting on all of the above. You knew I’d discovered the secret room underneath the dungeon when I confronted you with the remains of your mother’s body. Not that I blamed you for offing the cow the moment you became a vampire. She had sold you to that sadistic pedophile, after all. Not exactly ‘Mother of the Year’ material. But you could at least have buried your leftovers.”
    Falcon managed to momentarily break free, falling backwards onto the couch. “I don’t know what you’re talking about! There are no dead women. You’re delusional. Mad as a hatter. I’ve never been anything but faithful and true. You don’t deserve me.”
    Yvonne smiled wide, exposing her impressive set of fangs, and leaped – faster than my eye could track – onto Falcon. “I’ll show you what you deserve, pretty boy.” They flailed so vigorously the couch tipped over,