Vampires! A Bundle of Bloodsuckers Read Free

described as evil. “He’s merely trying to distract me from the fact that he’s been screwing every blood-whore in the theater company. While it might be true that Jacques lusts after me, Falcon knows I haven’t tasted that particular wine.” She narrowed her eyes and gazed at the love of her long life. “Not that I wouldn’t consider it under the right circumstances.”
    Falcon lurched out of his chair, snarling, exposing all his teeth. Flashing crimson eyes dominated his pale face. He didn’t look nearly as handsome in his pissed-off vampire role. I didn’t think I’d ever seen fangs as long and sharp as his; they were truly lethal weapons.
    I took an unconscious step backwards, bumping into my chair.
    Jesus. I am so not trained for this.
    Fighting my own increasing anxiety, I struggled to relax, and wracked my brain for a standard couples technique to ease the tension and move the session in a positive direction. I opted for a simple Gestalt process, and breathed deeply to calm the nervousness I was sure they could sense.
    “Falcon, would you be willing to participate in a therapeutic exercise with Yvonne?” I focused on keeping my hands from trembling.
    He sneered, Elvis style, the red of his eyes diminishing. “That depends on what it is.”
    I switched my gaze to Yvonne, who watched me as if I were an interesting specimen or an unexpected snack. “Yvonne, are you willing to share?”
    The question obviously surprised her because her eyebrows rose and she tilted her head to the side. “Share?” She paused for a few seconds, as if the concept was unfamiliar. I had no doubt vampires had a different – bloody – definition for that word. She studied me from beneath her dark eyelashes. “Share what?”
    “Just a few feelings and emotions. Let me set the stage, so to speak.” I moved quickly to an open area in the center of the room, pulled two chairs together, and arranged the seats to face each other.
    Keeping my voice light, I stood behind the chairs, spreading my arms wide like a game show model. “Okay, if you’ll both come here and sit, we can begin.” I tapped the tops of the chairs with my fingers. Seconds passed like hours. The two of them were so utterly still it was impossible to feel their presence. If my eyes weren’t assuring me they were still staring at one another, I’d have believed I was alone in the room. Suddenly, the hairs on my arms rose and a low, snarling sound rent the air. I didn’t know which one of them was growling, but sensing that things were about to go south quickly, I moved between them – not the brightest choice, perhaps, but I was trying to keep the situation from escalating.
    Great, Kismet. Nothing like annoying two hungry predators.
    “Are we ready? Come on, you two. Humor the therapist. I know you both want to have a healthy relationship, or at least that’s what you told me.” I pointed at the empty chairs. I didn’t know what I’d do if they continued to growl at each other, but my stars must have been auspiciously aligned, or my karma sufficiently balanced, because they drifted to the new seating arrangement.
    I’d placed the chairs close enough together that there were only a few inches of space between their knees. My heart pounded so forcefully in my chest I could actually hear it, so I knew the vampires, with their exceptional hearing, would pick up every syncopated beat. And, of course, there was that smelling-my-fear thing. I had a ludicrous thought about finding a deodorant that would be strong enough to fool the undead.
    Eau De Corpse?
    Oddly, the moment they sat facing each other, their auras calmed and their muscles relaxed. Yvonne stopped fisting her hands and Falcon’s fangs retracted.
    Whew. I thought we were in for a blood bath.
    I stood next to them, and spoke softly. “Yvonne, would you please look into Falcon’s eyes and tell him how you feel when you’re worried about his whereabouts?”
    She opened her mouth, then closed it