The Kryptonite Kid: A Novel Read Free

already dead. So you have to live there forever and ever and maybe even longer.
    YOU BETTER PRAY YOU LIVE TO MAKE YOUR FIRST HOLY CONFESSION! YOU BETTER PRAY EVERY MINUTE YOU HAVE!
    She was standing right next to me and I looked over at Robert and watched him cry as he looked and watched me cry. Me and Robert do everything together. He’s my bestfriend. That’s when she said I was a SINNER and I had committed a SACRILEDGE and I’d be really lucky if God decided to forgive me.
    SUPERMAN IN THE HOUSE OF GOD! she said again and I was really mad. Boy was I mad! But I couldn’t do nothing because I was crying too hard.
    And just then she grabbed the comicbook and teared it up and threw it in the air and a piece of Jimmy Olsen’s head floated down on my desk and I felt a really hard BANG! on the back of my head and I got real dizzie. It was like when I got stung by a bee when me and Robert was in our Secret Hiding Place back near Old Lady Holbrook’s spring and it really hurt. I had seen her hit other kids like that but she never hit me like that before and I hope she never does it again. But I think she will because once she doesn’t like you then she NEVER likes you because that’s the way nunns are. She said she was gonna tell the Principle and she said she was gonna call my mom and dad and she said I better pray. And so that’s why I was wondering if you could send her to The Phantom Zone instead of my brother Buster if that’s OK with you? I hope I explained everything so you understand how importent it is, Superman. Thank you very much.
      
Your Very Good Friends,
JERRY AND ROBERT

    PS: If you wanted to send both of them to The Phantom Zone then that would be OK too.
      
      
      
    DEAR SUPERMAN,
      
    I look at it this way. You’re just as good as God and so I think it’s OK if you’re in his house and besides I know you wouldn’t mind it if God was in your Fortress of Solitude. I just wanted to tell you that in case you felt bad about what Sister Mary Justin said. Robert helped me think of the idea to write and tell you that. So long.
      
Your pals,
Jerry Chariot and Robert
      
    PS: I may not be able to write so much anymore because I don’t get no allowence and can’t buy no stamps nomore. Not since Sister Mary Justin called my dad and I got in all that trouble. But Robert said he would pay for all the stamps out of his allowence if we put his name first sometimes.
      
Robert and Jerry Chariot
      
    PS: Robert said to say HI to Jimmy Olsen if he isn’t out getting a scoop.

     
      
    DEAR SUPERPAL,
      
    A lot of the kids in school have been laughing and teasing me about what happend in church the other day.  They even call me a SUPER SINNER and the way they talk about me is just like the way they talk about weather nunns have brests or not. Duane Machado who was Saint Joseph in the Christmas play said they don’t have brests and it’s just stuffed with pens and medals and roserys and stuff. Michael Roinski who was a sheep in the Christmas play said they do too have brests only they were cut down and made smaller just like nunns hair is cut short and everybody knows they’re almost bald. And my bestfriend Robert said they have regular brests just like his mother’s only they’re not as big as his mother’s who is also Italien like Robert is. So I thought maybe you could use your X-ray Vision to look under Sister Mary Justin’s uniform and tell me if she’s got brests or if it’s other stuff? And then I could tell all the kids in school. And then maybe they’d like me and they wouldn’t laugh at me and spit on me in the stairwell. Robert says Hello to you and Jimmy Olsen. Goodby.
      
Your friends,
JERRY CHARIOT AND ROBERT
      
    PS: Me and Robert was climbing up to the Duck Rock which is way up in the hill behind my house and I thought I saw a meteor fall to the Earth and crash. So we tryed to find it because we thought it might be