The Sigh of Haruhi Suzumiya Read Free

Thirteen Wonders, the principal’s hair tripling in size into an Afro, the school building transforms and fights with some monster that comes out of the ocean, or ‘plum’ becoming a seasonal word for ‘fall.’ That kind of stuff.”
    Now, I stopped listening halfway, so I missed everything after the stairs part. Maybe someone who has the time could give me a rundown.
    “… well, fine. I’ll give you a thorough explanation once we get to the club room.”
    Haruhi apparently lost her good mood and fell into a sullen silence. We marched on, reaching the club room door in no time. Underneath the plate reading
Literary Club
was a scrap of paper with the words
with the SOS Brigade
scribbled on it. “We’ve been here for half a year. Nobody can say that this room isn’t ours.” And with that, she began arbitrarily asserting her occupational rights and started replacing the plate itself before I could stop her. People need to know when to be discreet.
    Haruhi opened the door without knocking, and I was able to see a fairy standing in the club room. Her eyes met mine, and her face lit up with a smile like the personification of a lily flower.
    “Ah… hello.”
    Sweeping the room with a broom, dressed in a maid outfit, was the SOS Brigade’s tea-brewing pride and joy, Mikuru Asahina. As always, she welcomed me with a smile as though she were a fairy living in this club room. Maybe she really is a fairy or something like that. That seems more appropriate than saying she’s a time traveler.
    Back when the brigade was established, Haruhi gave the incomprehensible reason of “I was thinking that we need a mascot character” when she dragged Asahina here. And then Haruhi forced her into a maid outfit, and ever since, she does a complete transformation into the SOS Brigade maid after school every day. Not because she has a few screws loose in her head, but because she’s such a sweet girl that it brings tears to my eyes.
    Asahina has dressed up as a bunny girl, nurse, and cheerleader, but I have to say that she looks best as a maid. As for why, this outfit, while serving no purpose, avoids being suggestive in any way, and I’d rather it stay that way. And I might as well take this opportunity to inform everyone that the majority of Haruhi’s actions serve no purpose.
    But they often lead to something else happening, and that something else usually ends up making trouble for the rest of us. I wish everything she did was meaningless.
    One of the few good things Haruhi has done—actually, the only good thing she’s done—is creating this maid version of Asahina. She looks so good it makes me light-headed. This is the only time I can’t fault one of Haruhi’s ideas. I don’t know where she got the costume or how much it cost, but Haruhi has pretty good fashion sense. Of course, Asahina would look like a supermodel no matter what she was wearing.
    “I’ll have tea ready at once,” Asahina murmured in her cute voice as she placed the broom in the closet. She then ran over to the cupboard and began taking out our individual cups.
    I felt something hard drive into my side. Apparently, Haruhi had elbowed me.
    “You’re squinting.”
    Apparently, my eyes naturally squint when appreciating Asahina’s loveliness. Anybody else would do the same if they were in the presence of the adorable, graceful, and bashful Asahina.
    Haruhi took the armband labeled
Chief
off the desk where the pyramid labeled
Chief
was resting, and put it on. She then plopped into a metal chair and leaned back, glaring around the room.
    The other brigade member in the room was sitting at the corner of the table reading a thick book.
    “…”
    Staring at the pages without looking up even once was the first-year literary club member who was, as far as Haruhi was concerned, like “a bonus that came with the room after taking it over”—Yuki Nagato.
    The classmate who stands out as much as nitrogen in the Earth’s atmosphere has the strangest