The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time Read Free

television.
    Then they asked me for Father's phone number.
    I told them that he had two numbers, one for at home and one which was a mobile phone, and I said both of them.
    It was nice in the police cell. It was almost a perfect cube, 2 meters long by 2 meters wide by 2 meters high. It contained approximately 8 cubic meters of air. It had a small window with bars and, on the opposite side, a metal door with a long, thin hatch near the floor for sliding trays of food into the cell and a sliding hatch higher up so that policemen could look in and check that prisoners hadn't escaped or committed suicide. There was also a padded bench.
    I wondered how I would escape if I was in a story. It would be difficult because the only things I had were my clothes and my shoes, which had no laces in them.
    I decided that my best plan would be to wait for a really sunny day and then use my glasses to focus the sunlight on a piece of my clothing and start a fire. I would then make my escape when they saw the smoke and took me out of the cell. And if they didn't notice I would be able to wee on the clothes and put them out.
    I wondered whether Mrs. Shears had told the police that I had killed Wellington and whether, when the police found out that she had lied, she would go to prison. Because telling lies about people is called
slander.
    29. I find people confusing.
    This is for two main reasons.
    The first main reason is that people do a lot of talking without using any words. Siobhan says that if you raise one eyebrow it can mean lots of different things. It can mean “I want to do sex with you” and it can also mean “I think that what you just said was very stupid.”
    Siobhan also says that if you close your mouth and breathe out loudly through your nose, it can mean that you are relaxed, or that you are bored, or that you are angry, and it all depends on how much air comes out of your nose and how fast and what shape your mouth is when you do it and how you are sitting and what you said just before and hundreds of other things which are too complicated to work out in a few seconds.
    The second main reason is that people often talk using metaphors. These are examples of metaphors

    I laughed my socks off.
He was the apple of her eye.
They had a skeleton in the cupboard.
We had a real pig of a day.
The dog was stone dead.

    The word
metaphor
means carrying something from one place to another, and it comes from the Greek words meta (which means
from one place to another
) and ferein (which means
to carry
), and it is when you describe something by using a word for something that it isn't. This means that the word
metaphor
is a metaphor.
    I think it should be called a lie because a pig is not like a day and people do not have skeletons in their cupboards. And when I try and make a picture of the phrase in my head it just confuses me because imagining an apple in someone's eye doesn't have anything to do with liking someone a lot and it makes you forget what the person was talking about.
    My name is a metaphor. It means
carrying Christ
and it comes from the Greek words χρίστοζ (which means
Jesus
Christ
) and φερείν and it was the name given to St. Christopher because he carried Jesus Christ across a river.
    This makes you wonder what he was called before he carried Christ across the river. But he wasn't called anything because this is an apocryphal story, which means that it is a lie, too.
    Mother used to say that it meant Christopher was a nice name because it was a story about being kind and helpful, but I do not want my name to mean a story about being kind and helpful. I want my name to mean me.
    31. It was 1:12 a.m. when Father arrived at the police station. I did not see him until 1:28 a.m. but I knew he was there because I could hear him.
    He was shouting, “I want to see my son,” and “Why the hell is he locked up?” and “Of course I'm bloody angry.”
    Then I heard a policeman telling him to calm down. Then