They’re always making NASTY comments about any girl who wanders within six feet of them. I mean, who do they think they are?
THE FASHION POLICE?!
Today, in under one minute, MacKenzie gave out the following scathing fashion commentary while applying her lip gloss:
“Don’t you need a LICENSE to be that UGLY?”
“That outfit would be perfect for Goodwill. If she knows what’s GOOD for her, she WILL burn it.”
“OMG! I bought that exact same sweater she’s wearing! For my dog, from PetSmart.”
“What’s that awful STANK?! She’s supposed to spray on the perfume, not marinate in it.”
“She has SO much acne, she uses a special makeup brand. It’s called Why Bother.”
“What’s up with her new hairstyle? It looks like a small mammal made a nest in her hair, had babies, and died!”
“She thinks she’s SO cute. She’s just living proof that manure can actually grow legs and walk.”
To call MacKenzie a “mean girl” would be an understatement. She’s VICIOUS! She’s a PIT BULL in glittery eye shadow and Jimmy Choo flip-flops!
FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 6
I think I’ve finally figured out why I don’t fit in at this school. I need a new designer wardrobe from one of those really expensive teen shops at the mall.
You know, the ones where the salesgirls dress like Hannah Montana and have pierced belly buttons, blond highlights, and phony smiles.
But what drives me INSANE is their nasty habit of unexpectedly snatching open the curtain of your dressing room and popping their head inside when you’re like HALF NAKED. It’s enough to make you want to slap those blond highlights right out of their hair.
And when you look in the mirror, you can obviously see that the outfit looks HORRIBLE on you. But those salesgirls just smile really big and act cute and perky and LIE TO YOUR FACE by saying the outfit (1) looks totally fabulous, (2) brings out your natural skin tones, and (3) complements your eye color.
They’ll tell you this EVEN if you’re trying on one of those huge green lawn-size HEFTY TRASH BAGS!
I also HATE clothes that are “SNOBBY CHIC.”
It’s when the exact same outfit looks TOTALLY different on two very similar girls. The more popular you are at school, the BETTER it looks on you, and the more unpopular you are, the WORSE it looks on you. I can’t tell you HOW a snobby chic outfit mysteriously knows all of this personal stuff about you, but it obviously DOES!
WHY I HATE SNOBBY CHIC FASHIONS!
The SNOBBY CHIC phenomenon is quite a mind-boggling thing. Hopefully, Congress will allocate funding for scientists to study it, along with how socks mysteriously disappear from the dryer. But, until then, BUYER BEWARE!
Anyway, after my mom buys me a designer wardrobe, I’m going to walk right up to MacKenzie and her little entourage and tell them off really good.
But before I say anything, I’m going to put my hands on my hips and do that neck-roll thing like Tyra Banks, just to show them how much attitude I really have.
Tyra says every girl must find her own inner beauty deep down inside and ignore all the HATERS. She’s SO sweet and a wonderful role model!
Although, I have to admit, she’s kind of SCARY on America’s Next Top Model.
Especially when she’s screaming stuff at those poor contestants like, “You FAT, worthless SKANKS! You will NEVER, EVER make it in the modeling industry like I did! You have NO idea how much I’ve BLED and SUFFERED! And wipe that SMIRK off yo’ face before I SLAP it off, you little #@$%&!”
Then she starts crying hysterically and popping Tic Tac breath mints.
I just LOVE that girl!
I’ve decided that I’m going to tell MacKenzie right to her face (on like maybe the last day of school) that just because she and her clones dress like
FASHIONISTAS,
they do NOT have the right to say really mean things about other people.
“People” being the girls
THE FASHION POLICE?!
Today, in under one minute, MacKenzie gave out the following scathing fashion commentary while applying her lip gloss:
“Don’t you need a LICENSE to be that UGLY?”
“That outfit would be perfect for Goodwill. If she knows what’s GOOD for her, she WILL burn it.”
“OMG! I bought that exact same sweater she’s wearing! For my dog, from PetSmart.”
“What’s that awful STANK?! She’s supposed to spray on the perfume, not marinate in it.”
“She has SO much acne, she uses a special makeup brand. It’s called Why Bother.”
“What’s up with her new hairstyle? It looks like a small mammal made a nest in her hair, had babies, and died!”
“She thinks she’s SO cute. She’s just living proof that manure can actually grow legs and walk.”
To call MacKenzie a “mean girl” would be an understatement. She’s VICIOUS! She’s a PIT BULL in glittery eye shadow and Jimmy Choo flip-flops!
FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 6
I think I’ve finally figured out why I don’t fit in at this school. I need a new designer wardrobe from one of those really expensive teen shops at the mall.
You know, the ones where the salesgirls dress like Hannah Montana and have pierced belly buttons, blond highlights, and phony smiles.
But what drives me INSANE is their nasty habit of unexpectedly snatching open the curtain of your dressing room and popping their head inside when you’re like HALF NAKED. It’s enough to make you want to slap those blond highlights right out of their hair.
And when you look in the mirror, you can obviously see that the outfit looks HORRIBLE on you. But those salesgirls just smile really big and act cute and perky and LIE TO YOUR FACE by saying the outfit (1) looks totally fabulous, (2) brings out your natural skin tones, and (3) complements your eye color.
They’ll tell you this EVEN if you’re trying on one of those huge green lawn-size HEFTY TRASH BAGS!
I also HATE clothes that are “SNOBBY CHIC.”
It’s when the exact same outfit looks TOTALLY different on two very similar girls. The more popular you are at school, the BETTER it looks on you, and the more unpopular you are, the WORSE it looks on you. I can’t tell you HOW a snobby chic outfit mysteriously knows all of this personal stuff about you, but it obviously DOES!
WHY I HATE SNOBBY CHIC FASHIONS!
The SNOBBY CHIC phenomenon is quite a mind-boggling thing. Hopefully, Congress will allocate funding for scientists to study it, along with how socks mysteriously disappear from the dryer. But, until then, BUYER BEWARE!
Anyway, after my mom buys me a designer wardrobe, I’m going to walk right up to MacKenzie and her little entourage and tell them off really good.
But before I say anything, I’m going to put my hands on my hips and do that neck-roll thing like Tyra Banks, just to show them how much attitude I really have.
Tyra says every girl must find her own inner beauty deep down inside and ignore all the HATERS. She’s SO sweet and a wonderful role model!
Although, I have to admit, she’s kind of SCARY on America’s Next Top Model.
Especially when she’s screaming stuff at those poor contestants like, “You FAT, worthless SKANKS! You will NEVER, EVER make it in the modeling industry like I did! You have NO idea how much I’ve BLED and SUFFERED! And wipe that SMIRK off yo’ face before I SLAP it off, you little #@$%&!”
Then she starts crying hysterically and popping Tic Tac breath mints.
I just LOVE that girl!
I’ve decided that I’m going to tell MacKenzie right to her face (on like maybe the last day of school) that just because she and her clones dress like
FASHIONISTAS,
they do NOT have the right to say really mean things about other people.
“People” being the girls
Similar Books
Chronicles of Steele: Raven: Episode 1
Pauline Creeden
Come Away With Me (Interracial BW/WM Erotic Romance)
Marlo Peterson
Dorothea Dreams (Heirloom Books)
Suzy McKee Charnas
Next Stop Funnel Cake
Heidi Champa
The Fleet
John Davis
Family and Friends
Anita Brookner
Healthy Slow Cooker Cookbook
Rachel Rappaport
Narcoland: The Mexican Drug Lords and Their Godfathers
Roberto Saviano
Horse of a Different Killer
Laura Morrigan
Tagging Her Lynx (Alaska Lynx Clan)
Abby Wood