Stolen Innocence Read Free

happened last night, but I don’t know whom to tell. My parents stopped over at my grandparents’ condo in Wisconsin. When we arrived my cousins were there. Caitlin found out our cousins were staying the night so she asked if the two of us could stay the night. My parents said it was okay as long as we had a ride back home the next day. Our cousin Megan was having her mom pick her up in the morning To take her to the mall and said her mom could take us home. We said goodbye to our parents just as the pizza arrived. We all ate pizza and then the teenagers decided to go walk around the condo, they said I couldn’t go with them. I stayed back at the room where Grandma pulled out an air mattress for me to sleep on. I fell asleep while watching a movie. I was expecting to wake from the morning sunlight, but instead woke up around 3:00 a.m. to a very uncomfortable feeling. I felt something moving around in my pants. I immediately realized it was my cousin Brian’s hand moving all around my vagina. He was rubbing his hand back and forth. I felt his finger going inside me. I panicked, grabbed his sweaty hand by pulling it out and placing it on his chest. I looked over at him to see his eyes wide open. For a quick second I was looking into his eyes, but then he closed them and pretended to be asleep. I turned so my back was facing him and curled up in a ball. I was sick to my stomach. I could feel the pizza from dinner creeping up my throat as if I were about to puke. For over an hour I lay in fear holding back the tears. Just as the sun was about to rise I fell back asleep. Three hours later I woke up and told myself over and over it was all a dream, but deep in my heart I knew I couldn’t fool myself. All morning I couldn’t even look at Brian, but at one point we had eye contact and it was one long stare at each other. It disgusted me! I wanted to shower because I felt so dirty. When my aunt arrived she took Megan, Caitlin and me to town for lunch. We went to a place called “Bottles” where they mainly serve pizza. We ordered a cheese pizza, but I couldn’t take one bite without feeling like I was going to puke again. Just the thought of eating pizza right now makes me want to throw up. We later went shopping at the mall, but all I wanted to do was go home. I couldn’t get last night out of my mind no matter how hard I tried. I just keep telling myself it was a nightmare. I’m really scared and confused. It’s been a long day and I need some sleep.
    Erin

SEPTEMBER, 1996 9:30 P.M.
    It has been three weeks since the situation at my grandparent’s condo in Wisconsin. I keep trying to tell myself it was all a dream, but deep down I know it wasn’t. I’ve been babysitting for my Aunt Mary and I see Brian all the time. He acts no different than usual, very friendly and outgoing. I am trying to keep my mind on other things like school, the play I am in, and a book I’m reading. It is hard to stay focused in school and my grades aren’t the best right now. When I should be listening to the teacher I’m replaying over in my head what happened three weeks ago. Over time I hope I eventually forget it. It is on my mind so much. It’s ripping me apart.
    Erin

OCTOBER, 1996 10:15 P.M.
    This month has been good so far. I saw my best friend from my old school for the first time in years. It was so great to see her. We went to the park and I learned that it was her birthday. I’ve also been going shopping and swimming with Emily at the indoor water park by my house. School has been better. I talk to the social worker who comes to my class once a week to talk to me. Well I was thinking of telling him about what happened last month in Wisconsin. I’m just afraid he will tell my parents. We talk about school, my family life, and sometimes play board games. Every time
    I try to tell him I panic and leave his office without saying anything. I’m just really scared