Stalking the Unicorn: A Fable of Tonight Read Free

am. That's why I'm seeing little green men."
    "I'm not a man. I'm an elf."
    "Whatever,” said Mallory, shrugging. “At least you're little and green.” He looked around the room again. “Where are the elephants?"
    "What elephants?” asked the elf.
    "My elephants,” answered Mallory, as if explaining the obvious to a very slow child. “Who are you, and what are you doing here?"
    "Mürgenstürm,” said the elf.
    "Mürgenstürm?” repeated Mallory, frowning. “I think he's on the next floor."
    "No. I am Mürgenstürm."
    "Have a seat, Mürgenstürm. And you might as well have a drink before you vanish.” He checked the amount of whiskey remaining. “A short one."
    "I'm not here to drink,” said Mürgenstürm.
    "Thank heaven for small favors,” murmured Mallory, raising the bottle to his lips and draining its contents. “Okay,” he said, tossing it into a wastebasket. “I'm all through. Now, sing your song or dance your dance or do whatever you're going to do, and then make way for the elephants."
    Mürgenstürm made a face. “We're going to have to get you sobered up, and quickly."
    "If you do, you'll disappear,” said Mallory, staring at him owlishly.
    "Why did it have to be New Year's Eve?” muttered the elf.
    "Probably because yesterday was December thirtieth,” replied Mallory reasonably.
    "And why a drunk?"
    "Now, hold your horses!” said Mallory irritably. “I may be drunk, but I'm not a drunk."
    "It makes no difference. I need you now, and you're in no condition to work."
    Mallory frowned. “I thought I needed you," he said, puzzled.
    "Maybe a professor of zoology...” muttered Mürgenstürm to himself.
    "That sounds like the beginning of a limerick."
    The elf uttered a sigh of resignation. “There's no time. It's you or no one."
    "And that sounds like a bad love song."
    Mürgenstürm walked around the desk to where Mallory was sitting and pinched him on the leg.
    "Ouch! What the hell did you do that for?"
    "To prove to you that I'm really here, John Justin. I need you."
    Mallory glared at him and rubbed his leg. “Whoever heard of an uppity hallucination?"
    "I have a job for you, John Justin Mallory,” said the elf.
    "Get someone else. I'm mourning my lost youth and other elements of my past, both real and imagined."
    "This is not a dream, this is not a joke, and this is not a delirium tremens,” said the elf urgently. “I absolutely must have the help of a trained detective."
    Mallory reached into a drawer, pulled out a dog-eared copy of the Yellow Pages, and tossed it onto the desk.
    "There's seven or eight hundred of them in town,” he said. “Let your fingers do the walking."
    "All the others are already working or are out celebrating,” said Mürgenstürm.
    "You mean I'm the only goddamned detective in New York City who's in his office?” demanded Mallory unbelievingly.
    "It's New Year's Eve."
    Mallory stared at the elf for a long moment. “I take it I'm not exactly your first choice?"
    "I began with the A 's,” admitted Mürgenstürm.
    "And worked your way all the way down to Mallory and Fallico? You must have been looking since October."
    "I'm very fast when I have to be."
    "Then why don't you hustle your little green ass out of here very fast?” said Mallory. “You're making me think."
    "John Justin, please believe me when I tell you I wouldn't be here if it wasn't a matter of life and death."
    "Whose?"
    "Mine,” answered the elf unhappily.
    "Yours?"
    The elf nodded.
    "Someone's out to kill you?"
    "It's not that simple."
    "Somehow it never is,” said Mallory dryly. “Damn! I'm starting to sober up, and that was my last bottle!"
    "Will you help me?” asked the elf.
    "Don't be silly. You're going to vanish in another half minute."
    "I am not going to vanish!” said the elf in desperation. “I am going to die!"
    "Right here?” asked Mallory, sliding his chair a few feet back from the desk to make room for a falling body.
    "At sunrise, unless you help me."
    Mallory stared at