Shampoo Read Free Page A

Fun with Funner, you mean!” Ever
called out, overhearing Nat on speaker on his phone (I hadn’t
brought my phone).
    Ever and I then stood outside the station, the
morning having risen hours ago and now bright and blue. “Well,
that’s the most expensive date I’ve ever been on,” he
said.
    “ I now owe my sister FOREVER, so
thank you,” I said.
    “ Ha ha. Hahaha. I keep seeing you
plough into that cop-”
    “ Hahahaha! I keep seeing you pissing
against a wall while you’re being handcuffed!”
    “ Fuck, I’ve never laughed so hard in
my life – ”
    Then he really focused on me, stopped before
me. Towered over me. Gave me chills. “You’re not what I was
expecting at all.”
    “ You were expecting Nat?”
    “ Yeah, actually.”
    Then he leaned in and kissed me.
    Kinda was a great first date.
     
     
    Monday 15 May 2000
    3.33pm

    My first official day back at work, after six
long months off.
    Weird how absolutely nothing has
changed.
    Daryl Agnew is still as groovy as ever (our
resident drag queen), being very confusing with his sexuality,
since he loves to dress in drag yet he loves Holdens too, and is
constantly on the phone to Holden, barking, “When’s my new Monaro
arriving?” Meanwhile he’s wearing ‘60s cat’s eye glasses and his
hair is immaculate and holding enough product not to light a match
near him.
    Seriously, him and his wife’s little pink
presents and cards got me through back surgery and all that
loneliness and alone time and, well, you know. Major traumatic bad
break up with Rick.
    Soon as he saw me, he was all, “Pinky!” and
giving me big hugs.
    Everyone gave me big hugs, actually. Benny in
the warehouse said, “Pinky!! My only friend is back!”

    (sure. Benny has a million friends. Everyone
loves Benny)

    The bosses, Daryl Young and John Cash, are
still as cool as ever. Entrepreneurial, and running Sin like
they’re living out their midlife crises. Gerry, the financial
controller (and oddly, so much like Dad), Renee, the office
manager, all the reps, the warehouse crew…everybody the
same.
    And Matt Johnson.
    Not sure why I mentioned him all on his own,
except that he’s been on my mind constantly since our team building
exercise last week.
    I guess being handcuffed to someone for hours
does that to you!
    Evvy hasn’t called. But I guess we both only
got out of prison like, yesterday.
     
     
    6.56pm
    Another bloody call from Sharon
downstairs.
    She’s seriously driving me batty. Every time I
go downstairs to use my toilet outside, she traps me, and makes me
stay for HOURS with her. I’m gonna have to start peeing in a bucket
upstairs if this doesn’t stop.
    Now she’s got my phone number
though.
     
    (why? Why? Why did I give it to her?? Why??
What is wrong with me?)

    She did help me unpack and create my pink unit
though, when I first moved in six months ago. So I deal with
her.
    Plus I think she’s really lonely. But why I
have to suffer for that, I don’t know. But suffer I do.
    “ Karina, you have to get down here
RIGHT NOW!” she near screamed.

    (oh God, why??)

    I hung up the phone and headed downstairs, and
she let me in her back door. “My toilet’s blocked,” she
announced.
    Do I look like a plumber???
    “ And Ken is going to be here, in
like FIVE MINUTES, and this is SO EMBARRASSING, help me SCOOP SOME
OF THIS SHIT OUT AND PUT IT IN YOUR TOILET – ”
    It was just too much for me. “Sharon, if you
think I’m getting my hands up to my elbows in your shit –
”

    (you’re crazier than you seem)

    “ Oh my GOD, but he’s gonna be here
ANY SECOND – ”
    Ken is our bigshot real estate agent. All suave
and good looks and flirt and charm.
    He saw me coming a mile away, all my belongings
stuffed in the Civic (including the cat), and bruises still fresh
on me.
    I signed the lease on the spot, without being
made aware the unit has an outdoor shower and toilet (toilet
outside, shower under the apartment block).
    When I got to the unit and went to