Sarah's Child Read Free Page A

never known defeat until his family had been taken from him. Death was final, permanent, striking without warning and destroying the life hed built for himself.
    In some ways, losing the boys was worse than losing Diane, he said in a muffled tone. They were so young; they hadnt had a chance at life. They never knew what it was like to play high-school sports, or go to college, or kiss their girlfriends for the first time. They hadnt made love, or seen their own children born. They never had a chance.
    Sarah clutched the box to her breast. Justin kissed his girlfriend, she said shakily, a tiny smile breaking through in spite of the pain. Her name was Jennifer. There were four Jennifers in his class, but he told me very firmly that his Jennifer was the pretty one. He kissed her right on the mouth and asked her to marry him, but she got scared and ran away. He told me that he spected she just wasnt ready for marriage yet, but hed keep his eye on her. Thats practically verbatim, she added, laughing a little. Shed imitated Justins way of talking, drawling and tough for a seven-year-old, and Romes mouth twitched. He glanced at her, and suddenly his dark brown-black eyes were dancing with golden lights. He made a choking sound, then he was laughing, throwing back his dark head on the deep healthy sound.
    My God, he was a tough little nut, he chuckled. Poor Jennifer wouldnt have had a chance.
    Neither had poor Sarah. Justin had received all of his tough charm straight from his father.
    Her heart jolted at his laugh, the first genuine laugh shed heard from him in two years. He hadnt talked about the boys, or Diane, since the accident. Hed bottled up all of his memories with the pain, as if he had to keep them locked away in order for him to function on even a basic level.
    She shifted, still clutching the box. These pictures if you ever want any of them, theyre yours.
    Thanks. He shrugged his wide shoulders, as if trying to ease the tension in them. This is rougher than I thought it would be. Its still almost more than I can handle.
    Sarah ducked her head, unable to answer or look at him without crying. This was so traumatic for her that she was beginning to doubt her ability to get through it, but she couldnt do anything to make it any harder for him. If he started to cry, shed probably die on the spot. Part of the agony shed felt after the accident had been for Rome, knowing how he was suffering. She hadnt even been able to put her arms around him at any of the services; hed held himself stiffly erect, his face utterly white and withdrawn, sealed off by his grief from everyone around him. Rome had been alone, unable to share his pain.
    When she looked up again, Rome was sitting on the bed where hed slept with Diane, her silk nightgown in his strong hands. His head was bent, and he pulled the silk through his fingers over and over again.
    Rome She stopped, not knowing what to say to him. What could she say?
    I still wake up at night and reach for her, he said in a rough tone. This is the nightgown she wore the last night we spent together, the last time I made love to her. I cant get used to her not being there. Its an empty pain that wont go away, no matter how many women I take.
    Sarah gasped, her Nile-green eyes widening and becoming shuttered; he glanced up, his eyes bitter. Does that shock you, Sarah? That Ive had other women? I was faithful to Diane for eight years, never even kissing another woman, though sometimes when I was on a trip Id lie awake all night, wanting a woman so much that I hurt all over. But no one else would do; it had to be her. So Id wait until I came home; then we wouldnt sleep that entire night.
    Sarahs throat tightened, and she retreated from him as an unexpectedly savage pain slashed at her. She didnt want to hear this. Shed always tried not to think of him in bed with I Diane, trying not to envy her friend, eternally striving to keep jealousy from ruining their friendship. Shed succeeded while Diane was