Reign of Shadows Read Free

so
pure, so special. It’s—”
    “It’s
smothering me!”
    Consternation
filled Agel’s face. “You’ve known since childhood you would train here as your
father trained, following in his footsteps. Why didn’t you protest earlier if
you really didn’t want this?”
    “I
did. You know that.”
    Agel
shook his head. “If you really want something else, you could have insisted. I
did with my father, and he listened to me. Otherwise I’d be working in the
counting house instead of studying here.”
    Caelan
couldn’t believe Agel was saying this. It was like he’d forgotten those summers
when he’d visited E’nonhold. “You know Beva. He hears only what he wants to.
Nothing I’d ever said has made the least difference to him.”
    “Well,
if you told him you wanted to be a soldier I’m not surprised he ignored you.”
    Caelan
bristled. “What’s wrong with soldiering?”
    Agel
threw him a scornful look. “Spend your life tramping hundreds of miles and
being bullied, for what? For the chance to be speared by a heathen wearing
tattoos and a breechclout?”
    “I
would see the world,” Caelan said, his dreams turning his gaze back to the
ribbon of soldiers marching into the gloom. A trumpet sounded in the far
distance, mournful and low. The sound made him shiver. “I would serve the
emperor. I would have honor—”
    “More
honor in taking lives than in saving them?” Agel sounded genuinely horrified. “I
thought you would grow out of this foolishness, but you’re worse than ever.” He
threw out his arms, making his wide sleeves bell. “We are in the very place
most devoted to the preservation of life, and all you can think about is
killing. It’s a defilement—”
    “Oh,
shut up,” Caelan growled. “You sound like Master Hierst. It’s not like that.
You’re twisting everything.”
    “Am
I? Or are you? How can you glorify a profession devoted to slaughter? Yes, in
the name of the emperor,” he added scornfully as Caelan tried to protest. “And
does that justify it?”
    “Careful,”
Caelan warned him stiffly. “You’re close to treason.”
    Agel
sniffed. “Your father has dedicated his life to helping people, to alleviating
suffering, to saving lives whenever possible. He has honored the gods who gave
him the gift of healing. What about you, Caelan? What are you going to honor?
Bloodshed and pillage?”
    Caelan’s
face flamed hot. He had never heard Agel so cutting, so contemptuous. “You
sound like you’d rather worship my father than the emperor.”
    “Uncle
Beva is worthy of everyone’s admiration,” Agel said. “Yours most of all.”
    “I’m
not like him!” Caelan cried. “I’m not ever going to be like him. I used to think you understood
that. Now you sound just like everyone else.”
    “I’ve
grown up,” Agel said coldly. “You haven’t.”
    His
scorn hurt. Caelan glared at him, trying not to let it show. “You used to be on
my side,” he said softly, struggling to hold his voice steady.
    “I
still am. If I didn’t care about you, I wouldn’t be out here now, risking a
demerit to save you another beating.”
    Caelan
snorted to himself, almost wanting to laugh except it hurt too much. “There was
a time when you wouldn’t have cared about demerits.”
    “You’re
right,” Agel said quietly, almost with pity. “I wouldn’t have cared. I would
have probably raced you up here and we could have stayed out until we froze in
the cold, daring each other to risk an attack of the wind spirits.
    Caelan
laughed. “That’s more like it.”
    “But
I have enough sense these days to know that’s stupid,” Agel went on, still in
that same quiet voice. “I have my future to think about, and the way I want to
spend my life. I’m an adult now, not a boy. I want to be a healer, because it
is good work and helpful work. It gives something back to the world. I admire
Uncle Beva more than anyone else I know, and I’m grateful to his kindness in
seeing that I was allowed