front of my face, snapping me out of my daydream. ‘Where are you? It’s time.’
‘I can’t believe we’re doing this,’ I muttered.
To be honest, I didn’t even realise that I said it out loud until Jordan squeezed my hand and said, ‘I know. It’s great isn’t it?’
No, no it isn’t . My heart slammed; my stomach threatened to force me to vomit, but I had to keep my composure. Not just for Jordan, but for the crew and the other jumpers wishing me a happy birthday and egging me on like my own personal cheer squad. They were all so lovely, complimenting me on my spirit of adventure when all I wanted to do was run back to the car. To do so would have felt to me as if I were letting down the whole team. Maybe I was silly to think that way, but that was how I saw it.
‘Jordan, did Mike say anything about the wind?’ I asked as I stepped into the legs of my jumpsuit and pulled it to my shoulders.
‘Nope. I think if there were a problem with the wind speed or the currents they wouldn’t be taking us up. These guys are very safety conscious,’ he assured me, no doubt smelling my reluctance.
‘I suppose.’
‘Are you trying to find an excuse not to do this?’ Jordan sniggered, sinking his head down to mine to find my eyes. ‘Come now, this is why we are such a great couple. We’re always trying out new things all the time. Think of this as just another fun thing we get to do together. I’ve done it once before when I was in my early twenties, and I swear there is no freedom like skydiving.’
He held me close and kissed my forehead, and I held onto him as long as I could, just to feel safe for a little while longer.
Mike clapped his hands together to get everyone’s attention. ‘So! Are you ready for the time of your lives?’
The group called out enthusiastically. ‘Yes!’
‘We are, aren’t we, sweetheart?’ Jordan said, whispering in my ear.
I crossed my fingers behind my back. ‘Absolutely.’
‘I checked your AAD myself,’ Mike said, coming to a standstill in front of me. ‘That’s the automatic activation device. Don’t look so worried. You’re jumping with me.’
I drew a deep breath and exhaled a long sigh of relief. Well, partial relief. It was so much better to know that I had an instructor doing all the work for me, but still, leaping from the ledge of a plane into a colossal atmosphere of nothingness wasn’t a pleasant forethought.
‘Let’s do this!’ I faked, but it caught in my throat like a piece of dry bread.
‘That’s the spirit!’ Mike shouted, hauling me off by the wrist with Jordan trotting behind us.
It just isn’t fair, I thought, as we boarded the plane single-file. I had finally made it to thirty and was really looking forward to not giving a toss about the odd grey hair here or there or the fact that I had my first wrinkle. All of my friends said the same thing – once you reached thirty, the real you begins to shine through. Confidence comes in abundance. That may well be for some, but as the narrow door of the plane snapped shut, I found myself wishing Jordan had booked this jump for my 31 st . At least that way I’d have known for a year what it felt like to finally be free from the worry of what others thought of me. But no, I’d stupidly agreed to join him on an overpriced suicide attempt.
I was stuck in an aluminium tube they generously called a plane, packed in among a bunch of adrenaline junkies and waiting to be hurled into the sky with nothing to protect me but a few yards of fabric.
All because I was in love with a man who wanted adventure.
The engines on the wings roared to life, the plane lurched forward, and my heart lodged itself in my throat, declining all invitations to return to its original position. The rest of the half-dozen skydivers chattered excitedly amongst themselves, and as I clutched at the armrests of my chair, I stared at Jordan sitting quietly and looking out the side window with a dreamy, almost serene look on