Meant To Be Read Free

he have to leave me? It’s not fair. He’s making me sad, and he’s making you sad all the time.”
    In that moment her heart shattered again, “I’m sorry, honey, but it’s not Daddy’s fault. He didn’t have a choice. I want you to know that he’d be here if he could. I need you to know that, Jayden, and it makes me sad to hear that you’re angry with him, but I understand. He loves you just as much as I do and always will, even in Heaven. Do you understand?”
    “ But it’s still not fair,” he whined, “I want him back.”
    “ I know, Jayden. I do too, but it gets better with time. I promise.” Those words were easier said than to live with. It would be a long time before the family survived his loss. Jenna knew it, but looked forward to the day, anyway.
    When he was ready to visit, Jayden hugged his grandfather, “I’m not mad at you anymore, Grandpa. You don’t look like Daddy; you look like me.”

    * * * *

    As the months passed, the days were hard. They still hurt to live through, but the anger eventually faded. Things did get a little easier with time. Jayden started to become his normal self again, and they developed a routine that got them through their rough patches. Jenna was still numb though, barely having an appetite and feeling empty. Regardless, the time flew by.
    On the anniversary of his death, they would spend the day to themselves. No matter how much Sam or her parents bothered her about not being alone.
    “Do you know what today is?” she asked that morning.
    He nodded and whispered, “The day Daddy left.”
    “It is, Jayden. So what would you like to do today?”
    “ Could we go to the park?” he asked, not willing to make eye contact.
    “ The park sounds nice. Maybe we could stop and get some ice cream.”
    Jayden loved his ice cream, but the smile on his face was what she’d hoped for. Smiling back, she reached for his hand. “It’s okay to be sad, Jayden, but it’s also okay to feel angry or happy. It’s okay to laugh or cry. I love you, honey, and I just want you to know that showing your emotions is okay if you need to, especially today.”
    “Can we bring Daddy with us?”
    She nodded and went to get the urn. “Are you ready?” She didn’t care how stupid it may have looked to others. Anything to make things easier on Jayden was the number one priority. So they spent the day as a family. That day Jayden got whatever he wanted and then some.

    * * * *

    Jenna was finally able to have her meltdown after Jayden fell asleep. She’d gone upstairs to change into one of Tyler’s shirts, but that night it just didn’t feel the same.
    She could smell him before, could almost feel his arms wrapped around her anytime she’d put one on, like he was still with her. Then there was nothing.
    He was gone, and she needed him back. She needed that feeling of security, but he’d left her, in body and now in spirit.
    Running to the closet, she pulled everything that belonged to him, but still nothing. “No, Tyler, don’t leave me,” she cried, sitting in the middle of the heap.
    That’s how Sam found her when she stopped by to check on things and heard her sobbing.
    “He’s gone.” Jenna cried.
    Sam rushed to her, wrapping her arms around her tight. “He’s been gone for a while, Jenna.”
    “No.” Shaking her head, Jenna had to explain. “I could still feel him though. He was still with me. I could smell him, I could feel his arms around me, and now I don’t feel anything, Sam. Please, he can’t leave me. Please, Sam, please, just make him come back to me.”
    “I’m so sorry, Jenna. I wish I could.”

    Chapter Three

    A flashlight shone on her face as a strange voice called out to her, “Jenna, Jenna can you hear me?” Her vision was blurry. She could feel herself blink to try and focus and hear herself as she wondered what was happening. Her body was warm and felt really heavy as she lay there, unable to move.
    It became dark again, and the voices