Halfway to Forever Read Free

Hannah’s heart. Her fingers stopped moving and settled over Alicia’s name.
    “Matt and I have decided to … to adopt a little girl.” Her voice broke, and from behind her sunglasses tears trickled down her face and dripped off her chin.
    She waited until she could find her voice. “After … after the accident I couldn’t imagine ever loving another man,” Hannah wiped the back of her hand across her wet chin. “Or another daughter.” A sound that was part laugh, part sob slipped from her lips. “But here I am, happy, married, and … convinced God has another daughter for me somewhere out there.”
    The traffic hummed from the road behind her. “You understand, right, Alicia? I’m not trying to … to replace you, honey.” She sniffed. “The bond you and I shared, the one you and Jenny shared, that’s something none of us will ever have again. Not like it was.”
    Hannah paused and gazed up, willing herself to see beyond the blue to the place where Tom and Alicia now lived and loved and laughed.
    Gradually her eyes shifted back to the tombstones. “I saw a documentary last night about kids in America, kids waiting for someone to love them, and … I don’t know … something inside me snapped.” She shrugged and managed a smile despite the fresh tears on her cheeks. “I can’t have more babies. We’ve known that since Jenny was born. But adoption?” She sniffed. “I wasn’t sure I could do it … until last night. Then, all of a sudden, I knew. I
could
open my heart to another little girl.”
    The background noise faded. Hannah traced the
A
in Alicia’s name, pushing away the dirt that had gathered there. “We’ll adopt a toddler, someone who needs a second chance at life.” She blinked, and two more tears slid off the tip of her nose onto Alicia’s stone. “I don’t know where she is … or who she is. But Iknow she’s out there somewhere. And I wanted you to know bec–”
    There was a catch in Hannah’s voice, and she held the sobs at bay. “Because she’ll be your sister.”
    Hannah closed her eyes again and waited. The image of her oldest daughter grew clear in her mind once more. “Alicia …”
    There she was. The smile, the honey blonde hair, the warmth in her eyes … it was all as close and real as if she were standing there in person.
    There were no words, but a distinct sense of approval pierced the darkness. The feeling swelled, and Hannah had no doubts. God wanted her to know Alicia would have supported this decision with her whole being.
    Hannah ached to reach out and pull the image of her daughter close, but the lines began to blur. As they did, peace oozed between the cracks in Hannah’s heart. It was okay to let her daughter’s memory fade for now. The visit had reminded her once more that she no longer needed to feel the pain of Alicia’s and Tom’s deaths with every excruciating breath, but only as a sad truth that simply was and could not be changed.
    Hope wrapped its arms around her as she opened her eyes. It was time to go home, time to let Matt and Jenny know what she’d decided. Of course, Jade and Tanner Eastman would want to know, too. The couple had become their best friends these past years. They’d been there while Matt and Hannah walked through a year of collecting documents and filling out adoption forms, gathering letters and completing a dossier.
    The Eastmans understood. They were desperate to have a baby, but so far hadn’t been able.
    Despite Hannah’s tears, a smile tugged at her lips. Yes, Jade and Tanner would be thrilled that Hannah was finally ready to move forward.
    She let her eyes settle on Tom’s tombstone. “Pray for us, Tom.” Two tears landed near his name, and she wiped her cheeks with her fingertips. “Pray for the little girl … whoever she is.”
    Once more she looked back at the stone, at Alicia’s name carved in it. “One more thing, honey. When we bring her home and … and people ask me how