Choices Read Free Page A

of school and it was a few days until Jo’s son’s party. I haven’t been to Jo’s house since my high school graduation. Her parents still lived in the same old farm house without too many renovations to the original integrity of the beautiful structure that comprised the farm house. Jo’s home was beautiful from what I remembered. I had mixed feelings about going and I was happy that Paul was going to be home and able to attend but then that usually brought about its own set of anxieties as well. My thoughts were getting the better of me, as usual. Will my old friends see how wrinkled I am? Well, now wait a minute they will be old too, right? Okay, that’s good. God, I hope my kids behave. I’ll have to pull out the big guns...bribery. Will they knew how fat I became? Man, was I glad that I lost fifty pounds. I certainly did not want to see a bunch of old high school friends looking like a part of Jo’s farmhouse. Will the old cliques still be in touch? My mind was spinning. C’mon Laurel, you are not that insecure little seventeen year old. You are a grown woman, with a wonderful family, a loving husband and a great career. Yeah, right, who am I kidding? High school feelings never leave no matter how old you get!
     
    “Brielle, let’s get the lead out!” Paul shouted as we all piled into the van on the last Saturday in June.
    “Mommy, does Daddy have to yell at me?”
    “Well, he wouldn’t yell at you if you were on time for once, you big slow poke.” Vanessa chuckled.
    “It takes me awhile to find the right outfit.” Brielle whined.
     
    The ride to Jo’s house was too short and a little unsettling for me. My stomach churned as the kids played their DS games and Paul listened to his sports weekly wrap up. My thoughts wandered to years gone by and events and meetings and dates that happened a lifetime ago. Why was I still worried if I was good enough? Would I fit in? Did I really fit in at all? Nonsense, Laurel, you are being ridiculous. Honestly, who cares what they think. You have a good life; remember that, even if there are a few bumps in the road.
    As we pulled up Jo’s winding driveway to her parent’s farmhouse, I remember the last time I was there to vis it her. The baby was about four weeks old and Jo looked so tired and upset. Jo flew up from Florida after she had the baby and Robbie had left her and Brandon. Her parents were so supportive and loving. Kristy and I helped Jo take care of the baby that day, so she and her parents could get some rest. We feed and changed him and constantly held him. He was beautiful and smelled so yummy and delicious. I ached everywhere while I held him, he was so delightful.
    “Does it make you want to have one of your own”, Kristy whispered so as not to wake the sleeping baby.
    “Yeah, it does but, Christ not right now. Look at Jo. She looks so tired and miserable not to mention scared shitless.” I said in a hushed voice. “I have too many things to do, like go to college for instance. And carve out a life for myself. The thought of having to be responsible for someone other than me right now makes me nauseous and want to search for a puke bucket. Don’t tell me you’re thinking of having one now with Mitch, are you?”
    “No, but I do want one, more than one, maybe six. You’ve always known how I’ve wanted to have a big family. But, you’re right, not right now. I want to go to college too.”
    Jo surprised us by walking in the room. “You’re both right. Go to college. I’m so confused right now. I love Robbie but he wants nothing to do with me or the baby. I was such a fool thinking that he really did love me and would take care of me. Now, I’m scared to death and I need to figure out a way to take care of myself and the baby. I can’t stay here forever and the thought of seeing Robbie running around with some other girl just makes me sick to my stomach. I’ve been thinking about leaving Pennsylvania and going back to Florida. My