Back To You Read Free

in
his eyes messed with my already jumbled brain. What the hell was he saying?
Before I could form a response, two cheerleaders Spencer had danced with
earlier skipped drunkenly onto the porch. I felt a fake smile reflexively
spread across my face as they glanced between us. The door was open, so the
patio filled with the music from inside. The deafening beats were a dose of
reality.
    “Your fan club is
waiting,” I told him, nodding in their direction. My stomach turned slightly as
I watched him go from a laser focus on me to flirting with the girls.
    “Hello, ladies!
Did you miss me?”
    The duo giggled
and held out their hands for him. I rolled my eyes. Spencer rose from his
position in front of me and headed their way. He playfully swatted the shorter
one on the butt as she danced through the doorway. He followed them back into
the house and let the door slam behind him, smothering the volume of the music.
    I gazed out toward
the lawn again, trying to gather myself. The last few minutes of that talk with
Spencer had really thrown me. Why would he wait so long to speak up about Tim?
And what was that part about how it would be if it were him ?
Did he mean for that to sound so… inviting? Taking another swig of my beer, I
was grateful to find that the kid throwing up by the tree was long gone. I
didn’t need that to add to the sick feeling I had. The hinges of the screen
creaked open, revealing Spencer’s head through the crack in the door.
    “Hey…”
    I threw a smile on
my face to hide the turmoil I felt. “Yes?”
    “Stop being a baby
and have fun. You know I always come back to you.”
    He let the door
close again and disappeared into the house. I stared at the space where his
face had just been, wondering if he was talking about leaving with the girls
just now, or the three months that he’d be in boot camp. Maybe he was referring
to what he said about coming home to visit over the course of his career.
Whatever he meant, my smile turned genuine that time. Maybe I should just go
ask him what he meant. I drained the last of my beer and started to rise from
the swing. It was now or never, right?
    “Well, you two
sure looked cozy…”
    I rolled my eyes
and sunk back onto the swing. Apparently, I was doomed to hear a lecture on
Freud instead. “Hi, Tim.”

 
    Chapter Two
    Spencer

 
    I rolled over and
felt in the dark for my phone. My fingers moved frantically over the screen to
silence the obnoxious ringing of my alarm before it woke my dad in the next
room. Through the haze of waking, I realized what day it was. It was Monday,
and I was about to leave for boot camp. I lay in my bed wide-awake, staring at
the ceiling. I hadn’t expected to feel so nervous. How had I been so calm and confident
yesterday, only to wake up this morning feeling like I was on death row?
    Eventually, I
rolled out of bed and adjusted my boxer briefs. I’d left my window open
overnight and the breeze felt nice on my slightly damp skin. Why was I
sweating? Was I really that nervous?
    I tiptoed to the
bathroom. It was just past three in the morning and the world was still quiet.
I knew my father had to be up in a few hours to go to work, so I doubted he
would get up early to see me off. Just as well, since my interactions with him
were rarely anything but awkward anyway. I stared at my reflection in the
mirror, noticing the hard expression in my eyes.
    I remembered the
day when I told my dad that I wanted to join the Corps. I was twelve, and I had
just watched some movie at school that had Marines raising the flag over Iwo
Jima. I remembered telling all of my classmates that my dad was a Marine like
those guys and that I was going to be one someday, too. I had rushed home from
school that day and told my parents my plan. They both seemed so proud of me.
Maybe my mom was looking down on me and was still that proud. Hopefully she
didn’t hold my dating habits against me, though. As for my dad, I wouldn’t know
if he was proud of