I canât believe this is happening to me. Mom will kill me.
Showed Mom my report card. âThis isnât very good, Valerie,â she said, as if I didnât know already. Then she asked me what I planned to do about the D. âIt isnât for meâitâs for you,â she said.
I feel awful when she talks to me that way. I wish she would just yell and scream. When she asks me what Iâm going to do about it, she makes me feel even worse. At least she canât blame Peter for this. She knows Iâm more serious about school since I started going with him. He gets mostly Aâs. Heâs going to Harvard or Stanford. His parents have been planning for him to go someplace like that for college ever since he was little, and even before that. Peter says itâs the only thing the two of them agree on.
Friday, June 21
Hurray! Schoolâs out! And the wedding in Chicago is next week. It will be fun, but I wish I wasnât going to be away from Peter. Lately he is all I think about. It is like an obsession. Heâs in my mind all day. At night heâs in my dreams. I really have to try to balance it out. What will I do when he goes away to college?
Iâm so wrapped up in Peter, Iâve been neglecting everybody else. Nick is mad at me. I can tell because he doesnât come and sit on my bed and talk to me like he used to. I know we hardly do anything together since I started going out with Peter, and he probably thinks I donât care about him. I do, though. I know itâs weird, because most people hate their little brothers, but I really love Nick. And then thereâs Carrie. The other day she said straight out she thinks I only have time for her when Peter is busy. I donât know, maybe itâs true. But we still have great times together, like today.
Dianne and Carrie and I got a ride over to South Coast Plaza with Dianneâs sister. None of us had any money, so we were just looking.
Carrie walked into the hat store and in her terrible French asked the saleslady, â Avez-vous le nouveau chapeau de Zozo? â which is a line from a silly song we learned in French class. The lady didnât understand, and Carrie asked her if she had any pillboxes. When the saleslady brought her the hat, she put it on and with a perfectly straight face turned to us to ask, âVhat do you tink, mes chéries? Is dis de one for Pierre?â
I cracked up. Dianne kept whispering to us, âLetâs get out of here.â But Carrie wouldnât leave until we tried on every hat in the store.
I saw this really cute shirt at the Limited. I canât ask Mom to buy anything right now because Daddyâs business is bad. They are trying to hide it and not scare us kids, but I can tell Daddyâs depressed because heâs been drinking. Although heâs not a drunk or anything, he has been drinking a lot. Sandy and I talked about it when she called last week. She said heâs always like this when he doesnât have enough work. Still, it worries me.
Sheâs going straight to Chicago from San Francisco and then weâll all fly home togetherâone big, happy family.
We leave tomorrow. Still havenât gotten it. Iâm going to have to get the test. Damn, Iâm sharing a room with Sandy. How will I hide it from her?
Oh, please, God, please let me get it before we go.
Tuesday, June 25
The plane made me feel barfy. I hope itâs just my stomach and nothing else.
It was a real shock to see Grandma. Sheâs changed so much since the operation. Mom says sheâs a lot better than she was, but I could see that it was a real effort for Mom not to cry the whole time we were there. Iâm going to try and go over to Grandmaâs every day so I can be with her.
The wedding is Saturday. Itâs the first time in years that Momâs whole family and all of their kids have been together. Weâve been to a different house every
Showed Mom my report card. âThis isnât very good, Valerie,â she said, as if I didnât know already. Then she asked me what I planned to do about the D. âIt isnât for meâitâs for you,â she said.
I feel awful when she talks to me that way. I wish she would just yell and scream. When she asks me what Iâm going to do about it, she makes me feel even worse. At least she canât blame Peter for this. She knows Iâm more serious about school since I started going with him. He gets mostly Aâs. Heâs going to Harvard or Stanford. His parents have been planning for him to go someplace like that for college ever since he was little, and even before that. Peter says itâs the only thing the two of them agree on.
Friday, June 21
Hurray! Schoolâs out! And the wedding in Chicago is next week. It will be fun, but I wish I wasnât going to be away from Peter. Lately he is all I think about. It is like an obsession. Heâs in my mind all day. At night heâs in my dreams. I really have to try to balance it out. What will I do when he goes away to college?
Iâm so wrapped up in Peter, Iâve been neglecting everybody else. Nick is mad at me. I can tell because he doesnât come and sit on my bed and talk to me like he used to. I know we hardly do anything together since I started going out with Peter, and he probably thinks I donât care about him. I do, though. I know itâs weird, because most people hate their little brothers, but I really love Nick. And then thereâs Carrie. The other day she said straight out she thinks I only have time for her when Peter is busy. I donât know, maybe itâs true. But we still have great times together, like today.
Dianne and Carrie and I got a ride over to South Coast Plaza with Dianneâs sister. None of us had any money, so we were just looking.
Carrie walked into the hat store and in her terrible French asked the saleslady, â Avez-vous le nouveau chapeau de Zozo? â which is a line from a silly song we learned in French class. The lady didnât understand, and Carrie asked her if she had any pillboxes. When the saleslady brought her the hat, she put it on and with a perfectly straight face turned to us to ask, âVhat do you tink, mes chéries? Is dis de one for Pierre?â
I cracked up. Dianne kept whispering to us, âLetâs get out of here.â But Carrie wouldnât leave until we tried on every hat in the store.
I saw this really cute shirt at the Limited. I canât ask Mom to buy anything right now because Daddyâs business is bad. They are trying to hide it and not scare us kids, but I can tell Daddyâs depressed because heâs been drinking. Although heâs not a drunk or anything, he has been drinking a lot. Sandy and I talked about it when she called last week. She said heâs always like this when he doesnât have enough work. Still, it worries me.
Sheâs going straight to Chicago from San Francisco and then weâll all fly home togetherâone big, happy family.
We leave tomorrow. Still havenât gotten it. Iâm going to have to get the test. Damn, Iâm sharing a room with Sandy. How will I hide it from her?
Oh, please, God, please let me get it before we go.
Tuesday, June 25
The plane made me feel barfy. I hope itâs just my stomach and nothing else.
It was a real shock to see Grandma. Sheâs changed so much since the operation. Mom says sheâs a lot better than she was, but I could see that it was a real effort for Mom not to cry the whole time we were there. Iâm going to try and go over to Grandmaâs every day so I can be with her.
The wedding is Saturday. Itâs the first time in years that Momâs whole family and all of their kids have been together. Weâve been to a different house every