lie. I did it for myself, as well. I thought it would be cathartic, essential even, and long overdue. All the ghosts and horrors of our past are together in one place. For both of us.” He takes my hand. “We deal with them and move on. Now that we know where everyone stands. Now that you and I are on a single page. We can do it, together.”
“What’s ‘moving on’, then?” I ask.
“For me, it’s everything. And it depends entirely on what you want to do.”
I take a deep breath. “I want to see my father.”
Jeremy smiles. “I thought you would. I’ll let you.” He tugs me into him so our bodies touch. “Today, dear Lilly-Flower, is the first day of the rest of our lives.”
Chapter Five
“Okay,” I tell myself, taking a deep breath and trying to steady my rapidly pounding heart. “Okay, Lilly. You can do this.”
I’m alone in the middle of an upstairs hallway. A closed door looms before me.
My father’s in there. I once swore revenge on Jeremy for what he did to him. But if he used the collar only once…
That’s just a big fat lie. Isn’t it? Jeremy must have shocked Paul before he did it from the back of the limousine. Otherwise, how would the staff at Cedar Hills have known how to react?
Then again, Jeremy told me ‘no lies’. Maybe their efficiency with Paul was just standard protocol. They have other patients there, after all, and…
I shake my head. I’m stalling. The last time I saw Paul, we had barely two minutes together after I learned I was his daughter. Now, I have unlimited time.
Am I ready to face him? Do I even want to? Being away, I could pretend and make myself believe that maybe he is curable. Today, I might find out he is not.
That frightens me.
Jeremy is convinced. Realistically, he had every reason to make Paul see . And he had every possible resource available to him. If Jeremy Stonehart couldn’t do it, if his team of doctors couldn’t do it, what chance do I have?
Then I remember the utter clarity I saw in Paul’s eyes when he called me his daughter. The complete lucidity. That’s not me being sentimental, either. It’s nothing that I imagined. It was there. It was real. It cleared the shadows from his eyes.
With that thought firmly in mind, I grasp the handle and push the door.
I see my father. My breath catches in my throat. He’s actually here—literally, right here—in the flesh.
I recoil at the collar on his neck. Is it the new model, or the old one? There’s no way to tell. It’s just a thin black strip. Inconspicuous, sleek, thin.
Awful. Reprehensible.
Revulsion fills me at the sight of it.
Paul looks at me. He’s seated by the window sill, a stack of empty light blue papers beside him. He has a pen in one hand and there’s a notebook on his lap.
“Oh, hello,” he says. “Are you the hired help?”
I wince. Does he not even recognize me?
I close the door softly behind me. Jeremy warned me not to make any sudden movements or loud sounds. He said they have a propensity to set Paul off.
“No,” I say, as gently as I can. “No, I’m Li…”
“Oh, you don’t matter then,” he says quickly, and goes right back to his work.
Easy now , I tell myself. Remember, he’s delicate.
“What are you doing?” I ask, in much the same way I would of a child.
“Painting,” he tells me, not looking up. “I am drawing what I see outside.”
“Can I take a look?” I probe.
“Of course.” He gestures at the stack of blue papers and continues scribbling away. “Those are all complete.”
I walk toward him, a nasty suspicion already forming in my mind. It’s confirmed when, looking over his shoulder, I see his hand making wild strokes all over the page—without the pen leaving any ink.
“How many have you done?” I ask. I reach for the “finished” stack—the one with all the sheets completely bare. He snarls and snatches them away.
“Don’t touch those!” he snaps. “The paint has yet to