Too Cool for This School Read Free

face it,” Leslie said. “You’re totally class captain material.”
    “Yeah,” Robin said. “You dress cute. You’re smart. You’re mellow. And you’re friends with that girl who plays the cello.”
    “Cellos are so cool,” Leslie said.
    “Um, they really are,” I said. It seemed a little weird that Ava’s cello-playing abilities scored me additional points, but whatever.
    “Do you have any questions?” Leslie asked.
    Did I? Should I? In my mind, this wasn’t how I thought things would happen. I felt caught off guard that they’d even expect me to have questions. Hmmm. “So you don’t want to hear any of my speech?” That seemed like a solid question. I’d put so much work into memorizing it that it seemed like a total waste not to be able to use any of it.
    “We only make people give their speeches if we’re undecided,” Leslie said.
    Robin blinked as if maybe I’d offended her. “We just told you that you’re class captain. We’re totally decided.”
    What was I doing? I’d won. Forget my speech. Forget asking solid questions. Why wasn’t I acting totally thrilled? And that was when I exploded in excitement. I jumped into the air and yelled, “Oh my gosh! Thank you!”
    “Group hug!” Robin cheered as she opened up her arms wide. The disco lights swirled across her body.
    I didn’t give my speech a second thought. Winning felt great. And so did getting complimented and hugged by two popular eighth graders. As we finally released one another from our group hug, I knew that sixth grade was going to be a mind-blowing experience.
    “Don’t forget to exit out the back,” Leslie said.
    “Absolutely,” I said.
    “And don’t tell anybody about our theme yet,” Robin said. “Not even your cello friend.”
    “I won’t!” I promised.
    I left the gymnasium that Friday certain of one thing: My life felt perfect. I didn’t want a single thing to change.

3
    In addition to being mellow, my parents were also highly supportive. So after finding out that I’d won class captain, they offered to host a special dinner in my honor and let me invite my friends.
    “Time for toasts,” my mother said, lifting a goblet filled with sparkling apple juice. “Cheers to Lane.”
    I loved it when my mother broke out the Bohemian glass goblets. She and my dad had bought them together on a trip to Prague before they got married. The cut glass and colored stems looked impressive and made the night feel extra special.
    “May your class-captain duties not detract from your homework and may your job remain forever stress free,” my dad said.
    I sort of wanted to complain about his toast, because it wasn’t entirely cheerful. But I didn’t. I knew why my dad had said what he said. He was stressed out about his own job, coordinating a groundskeeping crew at a local college. But being class captain wasn’t going to be like managing gardeners on a college campus. I didn’t have
duties
. I just got out of class early once a month to hang out with cool people and plan school parties. It was the opposite of stress.
    “To sixth grade,” Ava said. “And all the awesome things that are about to happen.”
    Even though it wasn’t exactly to me, I thought that was a pretty good toast.
    “Mabuhay!”
Lucia said, lifting up her goblet.
    Ava wrinkled her face in disapproval. “What does that even mean?”
    “It’s a Filipino toast. It means ‘long life,’ ” Lucia explained.
    Ava rolled her eyes. Just because she was a musician didn’t mean that she automatically cared about cultural stuff like Filipino toasts.
    “What a drag to start worrying about death right now,” Ava said. “We’re twelve.”
    “Not all of us,” my dad said. “Some of us are approaching midlife.”
    “Rachel,” my mother interrupted. “Do
you
have a toast?”
    My mom was great at switching topics and smoothing over unpleasant moments.
    “I do,” Rachel said, raising her crystal goblet and clearing her throat. “Let’s