Toad Rage Read Free

was wondering if you knew where I could find some humans.”
    For a moment Limpy thought Ancient Eric was going to choke.
    “What do you want with humans?” demanded Ancient Eric when he'd recovered and swallowed the snake.
    “I want to try and find out why they hate us so much,” said Limpy. “So I can try and do something about it.”
    Ancient Eric thought about this for a long while. Then he spoke.
    “I'll tell you why humans hate us,” he said in a low voice.
    Limpy moved closer.
    “Humans hate us,” whispered Ancient Eric, “because they've always hated us. It's the way things are. We have to accept it, just like we have to accept that flying insects are attracted to highway lights andcrawling insects are attracted to wombat poo. It's a fact of life.”
    Limpy sighed. He remembered that Dad had been one of Ancient Eric's students.
    The snake stuck its head out of Ancient Eric's mouth and rolled its eyes.
    “You're not listening to him, wart-brain,” it said to Ancient Eric. “The young bloke doesn't want to accept that his loved ones are going to end up as waffles. He wants to go on a quest to discover great truths that will bring peace and security to cane toads for countless generations to come. Got it?”
    The snake made scornful noises as if it couldn't believe it was being eaten by such an idiot.
    “Do you mind?” snapped Ancient Eric to the snake. “When I want advice from my dinner, I'll ask for it. Get back inside.”
    The snake rolled its eyes again and slithered back down Ancient Eric's throat.
    “He's right,” said Limpy quietly. “That is what I want to do.”
    “See,” said a muffled voice from inside Ancient Eric.
    Ancient Eric leaned forward and turned his head so one angry pink eye glared straight at Limpy.
    “I know exactly what you want to do, young man,”rumbled Ancient Eric. “I'm just trying to save your scrawny neck.”
    Limpy opened his mouth to protest, but Ancient Eric didn't give him a chance.
    “What do you think would happen if I told you where you could find humans?” he continued in a voice that sent shivers down Limpy's glands. “If I told you about a place up the highway to the north where humans stop to put gasoline in their cars? A place so far away, even I haven't been there. A place so dangerous, no cane toad has ever returned from it more than two centimeters thick. What do you think would happen if a young squirt like you tried to go there and make contact with humans, eh?”
    Limpy shivered, even though the night air was as warm as mouse blood.
    “Two words,” said Ancient Eric. “Count them. First word, horrible. Second word, death.”
    Limpy's throat sac was quivering so much he thought for a moment his dinner wanted to join in the conversation too.
    “Understand?” demanded Ancient Eric.
    Limpy nodded.
    “Are you sure?”
    Limpy nodded again.
    “Then go away.”
    Limpy couldn't move. He tried to open his skin pores as much as possible to get more oxygen into his body. Mum was always telling him to do that when he was rigid with anxiety.
    After a bit his throat sac relaxed just enough for him to speak.
    “There is just one more thing, Mr. Eric,” he croaked.
    “What?” grunted Ancient Eric.
    Trembling, Limpy looked Ancient Eric straight in the eye.
    “Which way is north?”

“T he gas station?” gasped Charm.
    She stared up at him, eyes wide with horror.
    “You can't go there, it's too dangerous,” she pleaded. “Goliath reckons there are humans there with fingernails the color of blood, and some of them have got blue hair, and teeth that try and jump out of their mouths.”
    “Shhh,” whispered Limpy. “Keep your voice down. I don't want Mum and Dad to hear.”
    He took Charm by the hand and led her out of her room and through the thick foliage to the edge of the swamp, where they couldn't be overheard.
    “Humans aren't like us,” said Charm desperately. “They sleep at night and go out in the sun. Goliath reckons it's 'cause