The Mince Pie Mix-Up Read Free Page A

during rush hour. It was half past six by the time he pulled up outside the house, the evening already well and truly underway. Judy and the children would have already eaten, meaning he’d have to sit in the kitchen by himself yet again. Calvin opened the oven but it was empty. Probably punishment for the mince pies, which were still sitting accusingly on the side – he was evidently not out of the doghouse then. Never mind. He wasn’t that hungry anyway. He’d grab something later.
    ‘Where have you been?’ Judy was sitting on the bed when Calvin went upstairs to change, her face twisted and strangely resembling that of Perry’s earlier. Great. Just what Calvin needed. He’d already had a bollocking from his boss – he didn’t need another from his wife.
    ‘I’ve been at work. Where do you think?’ Calvin opened the wardrobe and pulled out a pair of jeans and a hooded top.
    ‘You’re late.’
    ‘I know.’ It was all right for Judy. She only worked a few streets away. If she ran, she could be home from work in two minutes. Not everybody had it so easy. ‘Traffic was terrible. It always is at this time of year.’
    ‘And you really couldn’t have got here any earlier?’
    Calvin held in a sigh. No, he really couldn’t have unless he had the ability to sprout wings and fly home. Which he didn’t. ‘Is this about the mince pies? I said sorry.’
    ‘You didn’t, actually,’ Judy muttered. Calvin chose not to hear and instead changed out of his work clothes (which Judy snatched off the floor where they fell before dumping them forcefully into the laundry basket) and into more comfortable attire. Sometimes it felt like he was wearing a noose to work instead of a tie.
    ‘I’m sorry, okay? About the mince pies and being late and everything.’ Over the years, Calvin had come to the realisation that it was easier to apologise, even for the things out of his control. ‘I’ll see you later. I won’t be late.’ He stooped to kiss Judy goodbye but she put out a hand to stop him.
    ‘Where do you think you’re going?’
    ‘To the pub.’ It was Friday. He always went to the pub with the lads on a Friday to unwind after a stressful week at the office. It was the only thing that got him through the week at times.
    ‘But we’re going to my parents’.’ Judy folded her arms across her chest, her eyebrows raising a fraction in challenge. ‘It’s been planned for weeks. It’s the last chance we’ll get to see them before Christmas. They’re spending Christmas and New Year with my sister.’
    ‘Your sister only lives down the road from your mum and dad.’
    Judy’s eyebrows rose further, no longer a challenge but a threat. ‘She moved to Edinburgh. Eight months ago.’
    Yes, Calvin remembered now. They’d helped pack up the house and Judy had cried for a week.
    ‘I forgot.’
    ‘You forget a lot of things.’ Judy let that statement hang in the air for a moment before she continued. ‘Anyway, we planned to go to Mum and Dad’s tonight. It’s been on the calendar for weeks and they’re expecting us.’ They’d been expecting them over an hour ago but Judy forced her lips to close tight. For a millisecond. ‘You promised to be home early so we could go.’
    ‘But it’s Friday night. It’s the only night out I get.’
    Judy threw back her head and barked with laughter. ‘Are you taking the piper’s piping?’ Calvin really couldn’t help replacing the obscenities. It had become a habit. ‘You go out on Monday and Wednesday evenings
and
Sunday mornings!’
    ‘But that’s to play pool and football.’ He couldn’t let his teams down, could he? ‘Friday night is the only chance I get to relax.’
    Judy looked at him. She looked at him some more. Too angry to speak, she stalked out of the room.
    ‘Does this mean I still have to go tonight?’ Calvin called after her.
    ‘YES!’

Chapter Three:

Two Parents A-Rowing and a Partridge in a Pear Tree
    Judy and Calvin thought it was best if