The Look of Love Read Free

saw Esperanza engrossed in the show on the screen, sitting with her back to the window. Esperanza’s shoulders moved jerkily up and down, and Jillian realized she was actually laughing, or her version of it. Laughing silently, not moving her mouth or her facial muscles.
    Jillian stepped away from the window and knocked on the cottage door.
    “Who is it?” called Esperanza from inside. The words were not distinctly pronounced.
    “It’s me. Jillian.” She arranged her face in a smile and girded herself for what she would see. The door opened.
    “Hello, miss.”
    Esperanza was wearing a peach-colored smock. Her hair was long and dark, with only the last vestige of yellow at the ends. The bottom of her face was covered with a clear plastic mask, modeled expressly for her and fitting directly against her ravaged skin. The mask applied direct pressure over the wounds to help prevent the buildup of collagen fibers that could scar and to protect the skin from any forces that could impair the healing process. Jillian knew that the face covering provided a barrier from germs and irritants and allowed visual inspection without having to be removed. So, all in all, the mask was a very good thing. Still, it always reminded Jillian of something a thief or a rapist or a home invader might wear to grotesquely distort his facial features. She shivered every time she saw it.
    “How are you feeling today, Esperanza?” asked Jillian as she walked inside the cottage.
    Esperanza picked up the remote, pointed it at the television, and turned down the sound. She gestured to her face as she settled into her chair. “I felt pretty good this morning, but now it’s hurting again.”
    Jillian nodded as she took a seat on the sofa. “In the morning you’re rested and have more energy. Later in the day, your body is tired and things bother you more. Do you want me to call and have them bring you something for the pain?”
    Esperanza gently shook her head. “No thank you, miss. I’ll wait until it’s time for my sleeping medicine.”
    “Good for you,” said Jillian. She leaned forward and patted the woman’s knee. “I know you don’t want to get too dependent on the pain medication, Esperanza. I admire you for that, but drugs are there to help. You don’t have to worry. Our doctor is very careful about monitoring how much is available to you.”
    Jillian noticed that Esperanza was wearing the gold bangle bracelet Jillian had given her for Christmas. She also noticed that Esperanza’s nails were freshly manicured and painted with cheerful red polish—the hands of a woman who no longer did housework for a living. Esperanza looked down and fiddled with the corner of her smock.
    “What’s the matter?” asked Jillian. “Is something wrong?”
    “Nothing is wrong, miss. Everyone is so nice to me. They work so hard to help me and make sure I am comfortable. Tonight they are bringing me a special dinner for New Year’s Eve.” Esperanza’s eyes smiled above the plastic mask.
    “We have a lot to celebrate this year,” said Jillian. “You’ve been healing so well. My father thinks he’s going to be able to discharge you in a week or so. Isn’t that wonderful, Esperanza? Soon you’ll be able to go home to your own place.”
    E speranza watched through the window until Jillian was out of sight. Then she went to the bedroom, climbed into the queen-size bed, and snuggled beneath the light down coverlet and freshly laundered white sheets.
    She was torn. Of course she was glad that her healing was progressing and that Dr. Abernathy was confident that repeated procedures would continue to improve her appearance. But she didn’t want to leave Elysium. She didn’t want to go home.
    Not ever.
    After living in the luxury of Elysium, where the staff catered to her every desire, how could she return to the seedy and suffocating one-bedroom apartment she used to share with three other women? Actually, she couldn’t go back there even if she