The Illustrated Mum Read Free Page B

that?” said Star.
    But with Marigold out of it Star was much better company. She'd done all her boring old weekend homework so now she was free to play with me.
    “I wish we could watch television,” I said.
    The rental firm had taken our television and video recorder away the past week because Marigold hadn't kept up the payments. She promised she'd see about getting us a new set but she hadn't done anything about it yet.
    “Will you
play
television, Star?” I begged.
    “Oh, honestly, Dol, you and your dopey games,” she groaned.
    “Please?”
    “Just for ten minutes then.”
    We went into our bedroom, shutting the door on the sleeping Marigold. Star wouldn't try properly at first, and said she felt stupid, but eventually she got into it too. I said we'd do
Top of the Pops
first because I knew Star liked being all the different singers. Then we did this children's hospital program and I was a little girl dying tragically of cancer and Star was my nurse giving me treatment. Then we played vets and Star's old teddy and my china dog and the troll doll we'd won at a fair were the pets in distress.
    Star started to get bored with this, so I said we'd do some soaps because she's great at accents, so for a while we played
Neighbours
and then swopped to
East-Enders
and then Star herself suggested we do
Friends
. We both wanted to be Rachel and then we got onto hairstyles and we stopped the television game and played hairdressers instead.
    Star played for ten times ten minutes and it was great. We almost forgot Marigold.
    She woke up in a snappy mood, going on about the cross again, muttering to herself, holding her bandaged arm. She spent ages in the bedroom after tea.
    “Are you all right, Marigold?” I called eventually, standing outside the door.
    “I'm fine fine fine, never finer,” said Marigold.
    She came out all dressed up in her shortest skirtand highest heels, her black chenille sweater hiding her bandage.
    “You're going out,” Star said flatly. “Of course I'm going out, darling. I've got to celebrate my birthday,” said Marigold.
    Star sighed heavily.
    “Don't be like that. I'm just nipping down to the Vic. I'll be back in a couple of hours, promise.”
    We both looked at her. “I
promise
,” she said again. She stroked her bulky arm gingerly. “I'm at the crossroads. I'm going to take the right turning now. You'll see. I'll be back by ten. Half ten at the latest.”
    We stayed up till midnight. Then we gave up and went to bed.

MARIGOLD
    I woke up too early. It wasn't properly light yet. My heart started thudding.
    I scrabbled around for my silk scarf. I always like to take it to bed with me. Star calls it my cuddle blanket. When she's being really mean to me she sometimes hides it.
    I could only feel rumpled sheet and lumpy pillow. I wriggled up the bed a bit and then realized I was lying on my scarf. I rubbed it quick against my nose, snuf-fling in its sweet powdery smell.
    I still felt frightened. Then I remembered.
    “Star!” I leant out of my bed and reached for her. “Star, wake up. It's morning. Nearly. Do you think Marigold's come back?”
    “Go and look,” Star mumbled from under her covers.
    I was scared to look. Scared in case she was in a state. Scared in case she had someone with her. Scared in case she hadn't come back at all.
    “You look, Star,” I begged. “You're the eldest.”
    “I'm sick of being the eldest. I'm sick of being the one who has to try hardest all the time. I'm sick sick sick of it,” said Star. Her voice was thick. I thought she might be crying.
    “OK, I'll look,” I said, and I got out of bed.
    My heart was like a little fist inside my chest, punching and punching.
    “Don't be so stupid,” I whispered in Star's voice. “She'll be back. She'll be in bed fast asleep. Just go and take one peep.”
    I crept across our room, over the landing. I stood in front of Marigold's open door. Had it been open or shut last night? I couldn't remember. I could see the