The Girl You Left Behind Read Free

considering whether this building might provide
     a more suitable billet than the Fourrier farm, where senior German officers slept. I
     suspect he knew that our elevated aspect would give him a vantage-point across the town.
     There were stables for horses and ten bedrooms, from the days when our home was the
     town’s thriving hotel.
    Hélène was on the cobbles,
     shielding Aurélien with her arms.
    One of his men had raised his rifle, but the
Kommandant
lifted his hand. ‘Stand up,’ he ordered them.
     Hélène scrambled backwards, away from him. I glimpsed her face, taut with
     fear.
    I felt Mimi’s hand tighten round mine
     as she saw her mother, and I gave hers a squeeze, even though my heart was in my mouth.
     And I strode out. ‘What, in God’s name, is going on?’ My voice rang
     out in the yard.
    The
Kommandant
glanced towards me,
     surprised by my tone: a young woman walking through the arched entrance to the farmyard,
     a thumb-sucking child at her skirts, another swaddled and clutched to her chest. My
     night bonnet sat slightly askew, my white cotton nightgown so worn now that it barely
     registered as fabric against my skin. I prayed that he could not hear the almost audible
     thumping of my heart.
    I addressed him directly: ‘And for
     what supposed misdemeanour have your men come to punish us now?’
    I guessed he had not heard a woman speak to
     him in this way since his last leave home. The silence that fell upon the courtyard was
     steeped in shock. My brother and sister, on the ground, twisted round, the better to see
     me,only too aware of where such insubordination might leave us
     all.
    ‘You are?’
    ‘Madame Lefèvre.’
    I could see he was checking for the presence
     of my wedding ring. He needn’t have bothered: like most women in our area, I had
     long since sold it for food.
    ‘Madame. We have information that you
     are harbouring illegal livestock.’ His French was passable, suggesting previous
     postings in the occupied territory, his voice calm. This was not a man who felt
     threatened by the unexpected.
    ‘Livestock?’
    ‘A reliable source tells us that you
     are keeping a pig on the premises. You will be aware that, under the directive, the
     penalty for withholding livestock from the administration is imprisonment.’
    I held his gaze. ‘And I know exactly
     who would inform you of such a thing. It’s Monsieur Suel,
non
?’ My
     cheeks were flushed with colour; my hair, twisted into a long plait that hung over my
     shoulder, felt electrified. It prickled at the nape of my neck.
    The
Kommandant
turned to one of his
     minions. The man’s glance sideways told him this was true.
    ‘Monsieur Suel, Herr Kommandant, comes
     here at least twice a month attempting to persuade us that in the absence of our
     husbands we are in need of his particular brand of comfort. Because we have chosen not
     to avail ourselves of his supposed kindness, he repays us with rumours and a threat to
     our lives.’
    ‘The authorities would not act unless
     the source were credible.’
    ‘I would argue, Herr Kommandant, that
     this visit suggests otherwise.’
    The look he gave me was impenetrable. He
     turned on his heel and walked towards the house door. I followed him, half tripping over
     my skirts in my attempt to keep up. I knew the mere act of speaking so boldly to him
     might be considered a crime. And yet, at that moment, I was no longer afraid.
    ‘Look at us, Kommandant. Do we look as
     though we are feasting on beef, on roast lamb, on fillet of pork?’ He turned, his
     eyes flicking towards my bony wrists, just visible at the sleeves of my gown. I had lost
     two inches from my waist in the last year alone. ‘Are we grotesquely plump with
     the bounty of our hotel? We have three hens left of two dozen. Three hens that we have
     the pleasure of keeping and feeding so that your men might take the eggs. We, meanwhile,
     live on what the German authorities deem to be a diet – decreasing