The Deviants Read Free Page A

wet.
    â€˜Your rash any better?’
    I looked down at my elbow creases. ‘Yeah.’
    I hugged him towards me and we stayed like that until he pulled back and kissed me in a desperate smash of lips and tongues and teeth. I wanted to lie down with him and just kiss, stroking his bare back like I sometimes did. I liked the feel of his body against me, and I felt safe, holding him. That was all I wanted to do. But he wanted more. He was so ready. I’d thought that if I kissed him long enough I would be ready too—that I’d get the feeling. The hunger. The throb between my legs. But it wasn’t there. There was something in the way.
    â€˜Come on,’ I said, and started moving away from him, climbing out of the pool.
    â€˜Where are we going now?’ he said.
    â€˜Where do you think?’ I said, reaching over for his hand.
    He scrunched his face up. ‘I better stay here. Got a kind of – situation going on.’
    â€˜It’s because of that. Come on.
    We padded through to Garden Furnishings to grab some picnic blankets, and then back out between the foliage towards the sheds, like Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. We chose a two-storey Wendy house with window boxes then we spread out the blankets on the floor and lay down. Our breaths were hot. Our skin was wet. He moved on top of me and kissed me all over my face, gentle as a moth bumping a light bulb.
    â€˜You’re shaking like a jelly,’ he chuckled.
    â€˜I’m fine. I’m just cold.’
    Maybe it would be all right this time. It was no big deal. Everyone did it. I stroked across the span of his back, his skin as soft as catmint.
    Before my brain could catch up with my body, I moved him away and reached down to peel off my wet Snoopy pants. I flung them outside the shed and they landed with a splat on the path. It would be all right.
    â€˜Are you sure you want to?’ Smiling like Christmas had just arrived, he started wriggling out of his boxers.
    â€˜Come on, quickly. Before I change my mind.’
    I couldn’t have felt less in the mood than if he was measuring me up for my coffin.
    â€˜Why do we have to be quick? We’ve got all night.’
    â€˜Before I lose my nerve then,’ I laughed, and shuffled back underneath him. I didn’t want to think too much about it this time. I just wanted it done.
    â€˜Ella, if you don’t want to . . .’
    â€˜No I do, I do want to. Please. Come on.’
    â€˜I haven’t got any condoms.’
    â€˜I don’t care this time. Come on, please – quickly. Kiss me again.’
    As we kissed, Max’s hands were in my hair, then at my neck, my side, around my hips and my bottom before one of them sneaked around the front. He was going ‘there’.
    â€˜Kiss me again.’
    I kept my eyes open. I wasn’t worried. This was Max and he loved me. I was safe in his arms. We both wanted this.
    â€˜You smell so good.’
    â€˜You do too,’ I said in breaths, even though the only thing I could smell was the intense spicy smell of the wooden shed. ‘Tell me you love me.’
    His fingers were going deeper. ‘I love you so much, Ella. God, I want you.’ He un-clicked my sports bra and pulled it off. ‘I want you so badly.’
    I held his head against my neck as my tears rolled down my cheeks into my ears. The necklace had slid down – the bear was resting on my sweaty shoulder, looking at me.
    His tongue flicked inside my mouth. ‘I want you so much.’
    I slid my hand into his hair and grabbed a tuft. Any second now, I’d want this too.
    â€˜You’re gorgeous,’ he said. Silently, a dragon roared in my belly. Max wriggled about, positioning himself so every inch of his naked body was against some naked part of mine. ‘Kinda need you to open your legs a bit though, Ells,’ he laughed.
    I was lying like a corpse. ‘Oh sorry.’
    Oh God, this was it. We were