The Cow-Pie Chronicles Read Free

made of? Dried mud and hay or something?”
    Dana and Tim looked at each other then smiled.
    â€œSomething like that. Come on, I’ll show you,” Tim said. He led them to the section of pasture where the cows were grazing, telling his cousins to line up along the fence and watch the herd munch on an afternoon snack.
    Roxy stared impatiently at one of the cows that was calmly chewing its food. “What are we doing here?”
    â€œJust wait a minute. I’ll tell you when to look,” Tim said.
    Roxy gazed across the pasture, which was full of black-and-white Holstein dairy cows. “Look for what?”
    Tim pointed at a member of the herd standing closest to them. “There! See that cow raising her tail?” Everyone watched as the cow raised her tail and pooped out a stream of brown goop that piled up on the ground in the perfect shape of a steaming hot cow chip.

    Roxy’s eyes became as big as the cow chips. “You made me throw cow poop all day! Mom!” She ran around the barn and to the house as fast as she could.
    Tommy laughed so hard he fell to his knees. “That was great!”
    Harry was laughing hard, too, and had to grab a fence post to hold himself up. When he caught his breath, he asked his farm cousins, “Okay, now tell us how you really make them.”
    â€œWell, the pile of poop sits in the sun a few days until it dries out. As long as nothing steps in it or Dad doesn’t run over it with the tractor, it turns into a cow chip,” Tim said.
    The two boys stopped laughing, looked at each other then glared at Tim. “You mean we really were throwing cow poop?”
    â€œWell, duh,” Dana said.
    â€œYuck! I need to wash my hands!” both boys said at the same time. Dana and Tim stood motionless, staring as the boys quickly ran to the house.
    â€œWhat’s wrong?” Dana asked her brother.
    â€œI don’t know. Maybe they got a juicy one,” Tim said.
    Tim and Dana headed in the direction of the house and when they turned the corner, they saw their company leaving, driving down the driveway. Their three cousins were in the back seat and they didn’t even wave good-bye.
    Tim and Dana’s parents were waiting for them when they came through the back door.
    â€œWhat did you do to them this time?” Mom asked.
    â€œNothing,” Tim said.
    â€œThey said you made them play with cow poop.”
    â€œWe had a cow-chip-tossing contest and I was winning,” Dana said. Dad burst out laughing.
    â€œWhat’s wrong?” Tim asked.
    Mom shook her head then sighed. “Look, I know you were playing, but when your cousins come for a visit, you have to remember some kids don’t fit in with the ‘cow-pie society.’ ”
    Dana gave her mother a blank stare.
    â€œWhat’s the ‘cow-pie society’?” Tim asked.
    â€œThe only society where tossing dried cow poop is considered good, clean fun,” Mom said.
    Tim frowned as he tried to figure out what she meant, and then asked, “What do you call our cousins’ society?”
    â€œDon’t worry about it. You’ll find out soon enough,” Mom said.

    Back to Table of Contents

    Chapter 3

    After their cousins left, Tim was back to shoveling cow poop, cleaning cow stalls and doing whatever Dad told him to do.
    One Saturday morning. Dad went into the kitchen where Mom was standing at the sink, cleaning fresh vegetables from the garden.
    â€œWhere’s Tim?” Dad asked.
    â€œWatching TV.”
    His dad walked into the living room and stood quietly, watching both of his children lying on the floor in front of the TV. They were caught up in an exciting Western saloon brawl.
    â€œWhat’re you watching?” Dad asked.
    â€œ Roy Rogers and Dale Evans ,” Tim said, without turning around.
    â€œIf you’re going to watch Westerns all morning, why don’t you watch a real one?”
    Dana stared at