The Big Blueberry Barf-Off!

The Big Blueberry Barf-Off! Read Free

Book: The Big Blueberry Barf-Off! Read Free
Author: R.L. Stine
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knew it. It says ‘Piggly Wiggly Food Stores’ on it.”
    Sherman jerked the watch away. He squinted at the back. “Huh? A supermarket watch? You’ve got to be kidding.”
    â€œI shouldn’t do this,” I said. “But you know I’m very generous when it comes to my friends….”
    Sherman squinted at me. “Give me a break, Bernie. Since when am I your friend?”
    â€œI’ll tell you what,” I said. “I’ll trade you my watch for yours.”
    â€œHuh? You’re joking, right? Ha-ha.”
    â€œI know it’s a bad deal,” I said. “My watch is a lot more valuable than yours. Mine is priceless. It belongs in a museum. But what can I say? I’m a sucker. I’m willing to trade.”
    I grabbed Sherman’s watch and tried to slide it off his wrist. I hoped he didn’t see how eager I was.
    â€œWhoa. Wait a minute,” he said, cupping his other hand over the watch. “What’s so valuable about your watch?”
    Think fast, Bernie!
    â€œIt’s from ancient Egypt. It has an engraving of the Egyptian sun god, Ra. I shouldn’t tell you this, Sherman. But my watch is probably worth a million dollars.”
    He stared at my watch. “The ancient sun god, Ra? Really? Let me see it, Bernie.” He grabbed my wrist and checked out the watch. “Bernie, that’s Mickey Mouse,” he said. “Dude, you’ve got a Mickey Mouse watch.”

    â€œIt’s the sun god, Ra, disguised as Mickey Mouse!” I told him. “You don’t think Ra would show his own face, do you?”
    â€œBye, Bernie,” Sherman said. He picked up his zebra-skin backpack and started away.
    â€œWait!” I cried. “I can pay you for the watch. Sherman—look.” I pulled a fat wad of dollar bills from my pants pocket. It was my life savings. My Eclipse Money.
    Last Saturday night, I sold a bunch of second graders tickets to watch the eclipse of Mars. Two dollars each. They got to sit on the grass and stare at the sky. I told them how lucky they were. I told them the Martian eclipse happens only once every three thousand years.
    But the kids were very confused.
    â€œWhere is it?”
    â€œI don’t see anything.”
    â€œI can’t see Mars. It’s too dark!”
    â€œOf course it’s completely dark up there,” I told them. “That’s how you know it’s an eclipse !”
    So the kids had a great time rolling around in the grass, staying up all night, partying with their friends.
    And good old Bernie B. made a bundle that night. And now I waved the big wad of cash in front of Sherman’s nose.
    He sniffed it like a dog.
    â€œIt’s all yours,” I said. “Cash money. For your watch.”
    Suddenly, a shadow fell over me.
    I spun around—and saw Headmaster Upchuck standing right behind me. His eyes weren’t on me. They were on the thick wad of cash in my hand.
    â€œBernie Bridges!” the Headmaster cried. “Young man, what are you doing with all that cash?”

Chapter 6
H EADMASTER U PCHUCK
    Think fast AGAIN, Bernie.
    I made my eyes go all wide and innocent. “Do you mean this money in my hand, sir?” I asked.
    â€œYes, that money in your hand,” Headmaster Upchuck replied.
    The Headmaster is short and squat and bald, and he kind of waddles when he walks. He looks a lot like a duck. Some sixth grade kids say he has webbed feet. But you can’t believe sixth graders.
    I was surprised to see him out on the Great Lawn. The Headmaster has his own little house and officenext to the classroom building. And he seldom leaves it.
    â€œThat’s a very handsome suit you’re wearing, sir,” I said. “I like the stripes. Makes you look at least a foot taller.”
    â€œBernie, the cash,” he said. “What are you doing with all that money?”
    I held the wad of bills tightly in my hand. “This is

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