The Accidental Proposal Read Free Page A

and for a moment I’m worried he’s going to let slip that he refers to her as ‘the pirate’ on account of her sunken chest. ‘The poor little mite must be starving.’
    As he swivels back round to face me, chuckling to himself, Wendy smiles sweetly, then fires the champagne cork expertly at the side of his head, causing him to yelp in pain. ‘Well, congratulations again, Edward,’ she says, filling up the two glasses. ‘To both of you. That’s you and Sam, I mean,’ she adds for Dan’s benefit, before heading back to the other end of the bar.
    ‘You might have told me to duck,’ he says, scowling at her, while rubbing the spot where the cork’s hit him.
    ‘You’re right . I might have – if I didn’t think you deserved it.’
    ‘So come on,’ he says, picking his glass up, clinking it against mine, then downing the contents in one go. ‘How did she ask you?’
    I stare at Dan for a moment, then decide I’ve got nothing to lose by telling him. ‘Well, it was yesterday evening, and we’d had a nice day at the wedding, not to mention a few drinks, and we were in bed discussing it, and . . .’
    ‘You were in bed with Sam and talking ?’
    I ignore his wide-eyed interruption. ‘And – I don’t know – maybe we were caught up in the moment, but all of a sudden, she asked me if I wanted to get married, and before I knew it, I’d said yes. End of story.’
    As I take a mouthful of champagne, the colour suddenly drains from Dan’s face. ‘Hang on,’ he says, ‘what were her exact words?’
    ‘I can’t really remember. “Do you want to get married?” or something like that. You know what my memory’s like when I’ve had a few.’
    Dan folds his arms. ‘So, let me get this straight. You were both a bit drunk, and at some random point in the evening, she said, “Do you want to get married?” and you took it as a proposal, rather than a question?’
    ‘Well, obviously, yes,’ I say, struggling to work out what the difference is.
    ‘She didn’t get down on one knee, or say, “Will you marry me?” like most people do. And like you tried to have me believe you did earlier?’
    ‘Well, no, but . . .’
    ‘And you didn’t think that she might have been asking generally ?’
    I get a sudden uncomfortable feeling in my stomach. ‘Generally?’
    ‘Yup. Like . . .’ Dan’s face scrunches up in concentration as he tries to come up with an example. ‘If you were talking about America, say, and she’d said to you, “Do you want to visit America?” Well, the obvious answer is, “Yes, one day.” Unless you’re actually standing in the travel agent’s, you can’t possibly think she’s suggesting the two of you go together there and then.’
    ‘That’s rubbish.’
    ‘Really?’
    ‘Yes, really. She was clearly asking me.’
    ‘Doesn’t sound that clear to me.’ Dan snorts.
    ‘Yes, well, you weren’t there, were you?’ I say, putting my glass down angrily. ‘And besides, the only way to make anything clear to you is to spell it out. With very short words. And in very big letters.’
    Dan holds his hands up. ‘Okay, okay. Keep what’s left of your hair on. I just want to make sure you didn’t get hold of the wrong end of the stick. After all, it wouldn’t be the first time.’
    ‘This wasn’t like that, thank you very much,’ I say, glaring at him. Dan is referring to an incident last year, where Sam and I were on holiday in Majorca, and we’d had an argument, and she’d asked me to leave. Turned out she’d been referring to the room, whereas I thought she’d meant the island, and we almost split up because of it.
    ‘You’re sure it wasn’t?’
    ‘Yes I’m sure.’ I take a mouthful of champagne. ‘Unlike you, I learn from my mistakes.’
    ‘There are no mistakes,’ says Dan, putting on a bad American accent. ‘Only experiences.’
    I stare up at the ceiling. ‘In that case, it’s certainly been an experience telling you about it.’
    He grins, then helps