Stepping to a New Day Read Free

back to the present before it flared to life. “I’m over fifty now and I still miss her.”
    â€œI still miss mine, too.”
    â€œI don’t think it’s anything we ever get over, but we get through it. Does that make sense to you?”
    â€œIt does. I dream about her a lot.” He glanced her way as if needing the reassurance that it was okay to share his feelings. “For a while I thought I might forget what she looked like, but Dad has a bunch of pictures, so every now and thenI take them out and look at her. God, I miss her so much,” he whispered. Tears shone in his eyes and he hastily dashed them away. “Sorry.”
    She handed him a tissue from the box sitting nearby. “No shame here. It’s a measure of how much you loved her. Has losing her been hitting you pretty hard lately?”
    â€œYeah. Like out of nowhere almost. I thought I had the grief thing under control. Guess not, huh?”
    â€œNothing wrong with admitting that, nor do you have to apologize to anyone. Okay?”
    He gave her a tight nod. They spent a few minutes sharing stories about their mothers. Paula told him about the birthday cake her mother would bake for her every year, and Eli told her that his mom always took him to the zoo on his birthday—even if it was a school day. “She made sure I got my homework the day before, though.”
    â€œYou have an advantage I didn’t have when my mama died.”
    â€œWhat do you mean?”
    â€œYou have your dad. My mom was a single parent.” And she’d never shared the name of Paula’s father.
    â€œHe probably didn’t think it was an advantage. I treated him like crap.” His eyes were earnest. “I want to apologize to him but I don’t know how.”
    â€œAdmitting that you do means the right moment will show up.”
    â€œYou think so?”
    â€œI know so. You’ll feel it. Just promise yourself you won’t let it slip by, okay?”
    He nodded. “I won’t.” He was silent for a long moment before saying, “I’m glad I came to see you today.”
    â€œSo am I.”
    â€œI know it’s been a long time, but my condolences on losing your mom.”
    â€œThank you, and the same to you. Anytime the grief starts rising and you need to talk, you know where to come.”
    â€œI do. Thanks, Reverend Paula.”
    â€œYou’re welcome. We’ll always have this bond, Eli.”
    He picked up his backpack and like Devon closed the door softly behind hm.
    Paula took a tissue out for herself and wiped her eyes. She hoped he would talk to his dad when the moment presented itself. It might not only bring them closer but would let Jack know his son was doing okay.
    With nothing else on her schedule, Reverend Paula decided to have dinner at home for a change. Like most of the people in town she ate at the Dog more often than not but that day she felt like cooking for herself.
    As she prepared to gather her things and lock up, there was a knock on the door and she looked up to see Rochelle “Rocky” Dancer on the threshold. “Hey, Rock.”
    â€œHey, Rev. I know I don’t have an appointment but are you busy?”
    â€œNo. Come on in. Have a seat.” Although Paula wasn’t licensed to counsel adults she was always willing to lend a shoulder or an ear.
    Rocky took a seat on the couch. She was one of Paula’s favorite people. Their trailers were near each other out on the July family’s ancestral land, and when the weather was warm, she often awakened in the mornings to the lilting beauty of Rocky’s flute. “So what’s up?”
    â€œJack asked me to marry him.”
    â€œAnd?” Paula asked, hoping to keep her excitement under wraps.
    â€œI’m not sure if I want to.”
    â€œHave you told him that?”
    â€œI have, and he’s willing to wait because he never pushes, but I’m wondering if