Stardawn Read Free Page B

Council gold. “Are you excited?”
    “Dunno,” I replied, and shrugged my shoulders.
    The man reached up and tugged at his mustache hairs. The woman beside him arched her eyebrows. She shuffled the papers before her, reading down my list of scores.
    “Your last test indicated a high aptitude for creative arts. Your verbal scores are solid, but your quantitative scores are quite low.”
    I looked at her, arching my eyebrows back. Of course, she couldn’t see, not with my hair a crazy net in front of my face. I sighed and shoved it back.
    “Always hated math,” I said. I could feel my temper boiling inside me. I needed to get out of there before I said something I was going to regret. The clean-shaven man in the corner smiled, but it seemed a little forced. His eyes didn’t crinkle at all when he spoke.
    “I’m sure we’ll find you the perfect job.”
    When I didn’t smile, he nodded, lifting up his hand to indicate the door.
    “You can go now, Alyana.”
    I did, watching them warily as I rose from my chair and pushed it back beneath the table. But when I closed the door behind me, I hesitated, pressing my ear to the narrow slit of light.
    Their voices came back muffled, but I could hear the concern in them. For me, or for them?
    “. . . never showed any behavioral abnormalities before. . . .”
    “Still,” the mustached man’s voice rose up with a rumble, “there’s the issue of her mother.”
    Momme? What did Momme have to do with all of this? I did my best to listen, but their words were jumbled; they made no sense.
    “We should be sure to match her to a Council-loyal citizen if we’re to ensure she doesn’t get led astray.”
    Yada yada yada, their voices went on and on. I stood in that hallway, the little children passing me on their way to the restroom, and felt my stomach drop down somewhere to near my feet. You were telling the truth, weren’t you, Benny? Oh, I didn’t mean to doubt you. I just didn’t want to believe it.
    I still don’t, was what I thought as I returned to my classroom and lowered myself into my seat. My girlfriends turned to me, smiling bright.
    “How’d it go?”
    But I didn’t answer them. Couldn’t. My eyes were on Mazdin Rafferty as he rose from his seat and headed toward the door.
    Mazdin Rafferty. His scores are abysmal, and we all know it. Always distracted by girls, by the cruel games he and his friends play. Writing all of our names on a list. Ranking us by our “assets.” My teacher has taken to warning him in the past year: “Watch it, Mazdin. An attitude like that and you’ll be stuck digging ditches soon.”
    But his attitude doesn’t matter, and his scores don’t either, do they, Benny?
    Because he’ll be a doctor. A vocation the Council will steal for him, right out of the hands of someone who deserves it. That’s why you and your friends cornered him in the dome. Because of the injustice of it. Because he is taking that job from a better, smarter man.
    It doesn’t mean that you should have lost your temper, you and those friends of yours. When I looked at Mazdin, I could see the scar that still healed on his lip, the slight shadow under one eye. You shouldn’t have let yourself get swept up in the tide of your anger, no matter how fierce. I want to believe that your friends talked you into it, that they’re wild boys, rougher than you—but who am I kidding?
    Because today, sitting at my desk, I felt sick with rage. My friend Sheila asked me what was wrong, setting her hands over mine. I swallowed hard, made myself smile at her. You told me not to tell anyone, so I didn’t. I’ll always keep your secrets. I hope you know that. I hope you’ll keep mine.
    I hope . . . I hope you’re wrong. I hope that at the Vocation Ceremony, Mazdin gets the grunt job he deserves, and I . . .
    I don’t even know what I want, Benny. Not really, not anymore.
    Yours,
    Alyana

58th Day of Spring, 22 Years Till Landing
    Benny,
    I didn’t expect you