habit. I don’t wear it when I work outside. Can you imagine wearing all that stuff while gardening?”
He shrugged. “I can’t imagine wearing it at all, frankly.”
“You get used to it.”
“Why’d you become a nun?”
“Why’d you become a biker?” I retorted.
“Because I hate when people tell me what to do and I love riding. Why’d you become a nun?”
I sighed. I sat back on my heels, looking at the ground.
“I got knocked up when I was fifteen. My parents are super conservative Catholics. They pulled me out of school, stuck me in a home for girls—most everyone there was either on drugs, a lesbian, or pregnant—and after that, I didn’t really have much choice but to take orders.”
“That’s fucking primitive,” scowled Dario. I shrugged.
“It’s my life.”
“Why don’t you leave? Are you eighteen yet?”
“I’m nineteen.”
“Then fucking leave. Tell those old hags to fuck off. I mean, unless you like being here.”
I glanced behind me, back in the direction of the convent, which was camouflaged and obscured by trees.
“No. No, I hate it.”
“Then run away. Who’s going to stop you? You’re an adult.”
I shook my head.
“It’s just not that easy. I don’t have any friends outside the convent anymore. My parents wouldn’t take me in. I just don’t know anyone.”
“So? Knowing people is awful. Being by yourself, that’s where it’s at.”
He pulled a cigarette out of the pocket of his vest and lit up. The smoke smelled sweet and fragrant. It had been so long since I had smelled a cigarette. I had been a smoker in high school, carrying a pack in the pocket of my Catholic schoolgirl skirt or even tucked into my bra strap and thinking I was so bad. Of course, I hadn’t smoked since I had gotten pregnant and then not since I had got to the girls’ home.
“So, what’s your name?”
“Sister Marina Ramirez.”
“Marina. That’s a pretty name. That was my older sister’s name.”
“Really? Was?”
“She’s dead.”
“I’m sorry.”
“So am I,” he said with a sigh, blowing a ring of smoke drifting out of his lips.
“What’s your gang called?” I said quickly, trying to change the subject. He had been looking at me expectantly, as if he wanted a piece of holy wisdom—a promise that his sister was dancing like an angel in heaven with all the saints. But at this moment, I didn’t feel like passing on the good word.
“The Damned,” he said with a smile. He pointed to the tattoo in his arm.
“It’s Dante,” I said, smiling back.
“Good eye. I love Dante.”
“So do I,” I said quickly. “I learned Italian so I could read it in the original. I told the sisters I wanted to read theology but I read Dante and Boccaccio instead.”
Dario grinned.
“Speak some Italian to me, sister,” he said leaning back. I gulped. I hadn’t expected to have to recite anything but fortunately, I did have a few passages committed to memory…
I began:
“ Nel mezzo del cammin di nostra vita
mi ritrovai per una selva oscura,
ché la diritta via era smarrita.
Ahi quanto a dir qual era è cosa dura
esta selva selvaggia e aspra e forte
che nel pensier rinova la paura!
Tant’ è amara che poco è più morte;
ma per trattar del ben ch’i’ vi trovai,
dirò de l’altre cose ch’i’ v’ho scorte. ”
Dario let out a long, low whistle as I finished up. His eyes were shining and he grinned at me. His smile made me want to go to sleep, made me want to fall into his arms. I had to avert my eyes, or else I was afraid he would see me blushing.
“That’s fucking beautiful. No one writes like that, anymore, I bet. He was one in a million.”
“Why ‘The Damned’ then?”
“What’s wrong, sister? Do you want to save me?”
“I already did,” I said, poking his bandages.