Selby Spacedog Read Free Page A

one about the ceiling but it would be
over your head’
Gary said. Suddenly he looked at his watch. ‘Heavens! I’ve got a plane to catch. See you the next time I’m in Bogusville. But do ring this number.’
    After Gary Gaggs had told them his Gagg Bag phone number and driven away, the phone rang.
    ‘There’s an emergency at the school,’ Mrs Trifle told Dr Trifle when she’d put the phone down. ‘Camilla Bonzer, the school librarian, is having a bit of a crisis. Could you come along?’
    Selby bolted into the back seat of the car and, on the way to the school, listened to Dr and Mrs Trifle’s conversation.
    ‘This librarian,’ Dr Trifle said, ‘have I met her?’
    ‘Yes, you have. We had all the teachers around for a barbecue last year, remember?’
    ‘Was she the one who was tying everyone’s shoelaces for them?’
    ‘No, that was one of the infants’ school teachers.’
    ‘Then maybe she was the one with a pocket full of chalk?’
    ‘No, that was a primary teacher.’
    ‘Not the one with all the keys to everything?’
    ‘No, that was the principal,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘Camilla’s the librarian — the one with glasses. The one wearing the badge that said: “Librarians Run on Hugs”. She helped you with the washing up. She reorganised all the dishware and cutlery.’
    ‘Of course! How could I forget?’ Dr Trifle said. ‘It took ages to put things right again. The spoons ended up in saucepans and we found the forks in the fridge.’
    ‘That’s because she organised them alphabetically,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘Librarians are very alphabetically minded.’
    ‘It’s a wonder the
glasses
didn’t end up in the
garbage,’
Dr Trifle said.
    ‘Oh, so that’s what happened to them,’ Mrs Trifle said, as they pulled up in front of the school and got out of the car.
    The street was littered with books. From behind parked cars, people peered over at the school. Suddenly there was a scream from inside the library and the sound of breaking glass as another book came hurtling out. Sergeant Short and Constable Long were huddled behind their police car. A woman stood beside them.
    ‘Camilla, can you hear me?’ the woman yelled. ‘My name is Frieda! Frieda Gho! I’m from the Department of Education and I’m here to help you!’
    Suddenly Selby caught a glimpse of Camilla standing at a window with a big black bomb in one hand and a match in the other.
    ‘Take a hike, duster-head!’ Camilla screamed. ‘One step closer and I’ll blow the place tosmithereens! If I light this fuse it’ll be snowing overdue notices for a week! Go ahead, make my day!’

    ‘My goodness!’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘She’s going to blow herself up along with the library!’
    ‘What a strange-looking old-fashioned bomb,’ Dr Trifle said. ‘The last time I saw one ofthose was in one of those Bruce the Bomber comic books that all the kids read.’
    ‘I can’t understand why she’d want to do this,’ Mrs Trifle said, crouching down behind the police car. ‘She seemed such a quiet, peaceful person.’
    ‘Librarians,’ Frieda said, shaking her head. ‘They think nobody wants them. They’re all quiet and peaceful till they chuck a wobbly. It usually happens around Book Week. By the way I’m the SSCC from the Department — the Special School Crisis Coordinator.’
    ‘And I’m the mayor,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘Is there anything I can do to help?’
    ‘No, this is a departmental matter,’ Frieda said. ‘And quite frankly, I don’t fancy our chances on this one. I think we’ve got a boomer on our hands.’
    ‘A boomer?’ Dr Trifle said. ‘You mean you think she’ll really blow the place up?’
    The coordinator nodded.
    ‘You’ll never take me alive!’ Camilla screamed and another book sliced the air, this time catching Frieda Gho on the ear.
    ‘That does it!’ Frieda groaned, as she dialled her mobile phone. ‘I’m calling in the SSTS —the Special School Tactical Squad. They’ll have to take her