Scarred Read Free Page A

I was going and I didn’t care who got caught up in my web. I was the golden boy to everyone in Jonesville, but I had had a dark side.
    I suppose it was inevitable that someone like me, who had been given so much, would turn out the way that I did. At least, that was what the doctor had said. But at least I had realized the path I was on before it was too late. That night I made a decision that changed my life. I had to.
    But it didn’t make me proud or happy. It didn’t make me think I was a good man. It only emphasized to me just how fucked up I was. And I was reliving those emotions all over again.
    Why had I gone to Steak N Shake? I had known, as soon as I entered the restaurant, that something was different. And when I had turned around and seen her face, I had felt panicked. She had been staring at me like she knew everything. I couldn’t face her, so I had turned around quickly, heart straining from the pressure. I knew that I was going into panic mode as soon as I felt my body go cold. I had had to walk out of the restaurant quickly. I suppose I’m a sucker for drama, because I had walked past her table and smiled. She had looked at me like a lost lamb.
    I was mad at myself for saying hi. I should have ignored her. But I couldn’t. Her brown eyes had stared at me with the same look they had had that night, all those years ago.
    I felt like she knew. Which I knew wasn’t possible. There was no way that she could have known. For all I knew , she thought of me as her savior. That was how the evening had gone down after all. I had looked like the golden boy once again. But it had been my entire fault in the first place. But she had looked at me that night with such innocence and trust. That look had struck at my heart. It had pierced my hurt, evil veil and awakened me. And I thought that perhaps I had been given a second chance to make everything all right. And then the accident had happened. At least, they said it was an accident. I didn’t think it was. And that was my fault as well. And it was then that I knew I had to give my life. It was the least I could do. I had to go away and fight for my country and if I died, that would have been the least I could have done to atone for what I had done.
    It had been a mistake for me to come back to Jonesville. It had b rought back too many memories, memories I had spent the last four years trying to rid myself of. Only, the dull pain that lit up my heart was accompanied by something else, a strange emotion that I didn’t recognize. I closed my eyes and breathed in and out again. Darkness and then her face greeted me. The face that had haunted me every night of my stay away from this place. I couldn’t believe that I had seen her. Lexi Lord. The girl who had turned my world upside down.
    My ringing phone interrupted me from my dark thoughts and I sighed when I saw Suzannah’s name. “Hello?” I tried to keep my tone upbeat.
    “Bryce?” she giggled. I had no idea what was so funny.
    “Yes?” I wasn’t going to give her the benefit of the doubt and let her know I knew it was her.
    “It’s Suzannah.”
    I didn’t answer and there was a moment of silence. “Your girlfriend.” She giggled again. “Well, your ex -girlfriend.”
    “Oh, hi Suzannah.” I kept my tone polite.
    “I heard you’re back in town?” Giggle.
    “Yes.”
    “You didn’t call?”
    “Why would I call you?” My tone was not so pleasant. I couldn’t believe that she had the gall to act upset. She is the one who never once wrote me a letter or called me once I shipped off to boot camp. As soon as I announced I wasn’t going to Notre Dame, she had pretty much dumped me. I guess a boyfriend in the military hadn’t been a part of her plan.
    “Oh Bryce, don’t be silly,” s he giggled. “We loved each other once.”
    I sighed and kept my mouth shut. Who was I to ruin her dream of the past? I wanted to tell her that sex wasn’t love , but I knew that was unkind and I was trying very