me with a mouthful of those cheese puffs, and I couldn’t help but laugh.
“He doesn’t look like much,” Jeff said.
“Yeah, but he has everything that I look for in a man,” I said.
Jeff cocked an eye while staring at Albert and appeared to be deep in thought before he turned back to me.
“Boring?” he asked.
I laughed again. He wasn’t completely wrong.
“Boring guys aren’t really boring ; they ’re just stable. You know what to expect,” I explained.
“Then why did you guys break up?” he asked while sipping on a beer.
“He cheated on me,” I said.
“With her?” he asked.
“I don’t know. I didn’t get a good enough look when I caught them in his bed,” I said.
“Wow, sounds like there are a lot of girls interested in boring guys,” Jeff said, “I bet you didn’t see that coming.”
I smacked my head against the wall, perhaps a little too hard. I didn’t even think Albert went to parties like this.
“Funny that he’s out with Carol; she’s slept with half the starting lineup, not me, though, she’s a little too … err … open when it comes to relationships,” Jeff commented.
I giggled. While he wasn’t exactly the most cultured person I met, I found a special charm in his ability to just tell things as they are.
“Hey Carol,” Jeff shouted and walked toward the two of them.
I peeked around the corner since Jeff probably had the two of them distracted. Over the music, I could just barely make out their conversation.
“I was, but I met Albert here a couple of weeks ago, and I just can’t imagine being with anyone else,” Carol said, kissing Albert on the cheek.
Albert had a weird and disgusting smile on his face. I wanted to walk over and smack it off his face.
“You mean, forever? Or just this week,” Jeff asked.
I blurted with laughter which I immediately had to staunch with my hand. I hoped they hadn’t heard me, and it didn’t look like they had.
“No, Jeff. Albert is a good guy; he ’s much better than all the other guys I dated,” she said.
“Well,” started Jeff, “you might want to speak a little quieter because just about all the other guys you dated are at this party.”
Carol had a frustrated look on her face, and she looked at Albert to defend her, but unfortunately for her, he remained tight-lipped .
“I didn’t come out tonight to get made fun of by a linebacker,” Carol said in a vain attempt to puff herself up.
“I didn’t know I was making fun of you. I just wanted Albert, here, to know what he was getting himself into,” Jeff said.
Carol, obviously flustered, stormed out the front door, followed closely by her date of the evening. I couldn’t stop laughing at how handily Jeff had dealt with the couple.
“You didn’t want them here, right,” Jeff asked as he walked back up, “cause if you want them back, I don’t think it’s going to happen.”
I reached out and wrapped my arm in his.
“Jeff, you just made my night,” I said.
“Let’s get you a drink and pick up where we left off the other day,” Jeff said.
I nodded, and he poured me a glass from the keg. I wasn’t much of a beer drinker, nor was I much of a drinker in general, but Jeff had earned at least one drink from me.
We adjourned to the tiny backyard of the house. Christmas lights were wrapped neatly around the trunks of the sparse trees that provided cover in the backyard . A picnic table sat against the fence, and the tables that Matt and I had setup earlier were currently occupied by people trying their best at beer pong.
We grabbed a couple camping chairs and sat them on the grass away from the crowd so we could chat.
“I didn’t know you were a linebacker,” I said.
“Well, I don’t exactly advertise my position. Besides, the people that come see the games know my position ; the people that don’t see the games just don’t care. I don’t care enough to tell everyone my life