Rock Stars Don't Like Ugly Bras Read Free Page B

come across hard, but you know what us Italians are like about family.”
    “Yeah,” Jake said with a nod.  “I’m likely to get a fucking horses head in my bed, I get it.”
    Luke began to laugh.  “I don’t think so, mate.  It’s just that she’s my papa’s brother’s daughter and when Uncle Eamon was dying Papa promised him, he’d look after Amber and Auntie Thelma.  So, after Papa died I kinda felt responsible for them.”
    “Yeah, yeah, I get it, I do Luke.  More than you know.”  Jake ran a hand through his hair, still finding its shortness strange.  “I’ll leave her alone and won’t upset her while you’re away.”
    Jake wondered again what on earth Freckle’s problem with him was.  He was a nice bloke, and he hated to think that someone couldn’t see that.
    “See that you don’t,” Luke said interrupting Jake’s thoughts.  “And don’t even try and make her another one of your conquests.  I will not be happy if you do.”  Luke pointed a finger at him.
    “Shit Luke,” Jake cried.  “She’d have my balls for earrings if I even puckered up near her, so that aint gonna happen.”
    “Yeah well, make sure it doesn’t.  Now, let’s go back to the kitchen, because I’m sure I heard Martha say she’d defrosted some of her chocolate and lemon cake.”
    As Jake trailed after Luke he was determined to try and prove to Freckles that he wasn’t the creep she evidently thought that he was, but how, he had no idea.
     

Chapter 4
     
    Amber and Jake had been alone in the house for a whole two hours before their first row broke out.  Ernie had been dropped off by Valerie, the local shopkeeper, and he had been farting all day, producing smells so bad that both Amber and Jake were starting to gag.
    “What the hell has she been feeding him?” Jake asked as he staggered onto the patio to get away from the stench.  “He stinks worse than that perfume you wear.”  As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Jake groaned.  “Sorry, that was a joke.”
    It was too late though, Amber had already pulled her usually full, pouty lips into a pencil thin line, and her nostrils were flaring.
    “That happens to be extremely expensive perfume, you dick.  But I guess the ladies that you’re used to... oh and I use the term ladies very loosely…” Amber said sharply.  “Well, they probably think that a can of body spray that costs over two quid is the height of luxury.”
    Jake sighed and wished he had some sort of filter between his brain and his mouth.  “Freckles, I was joking.  I don’t mean it.  I actually really like your perfume.”   This was true. He had noticed Amber’s scent on more than one occasion. It was light and crisp and reminded him of happy summer days – it just didn’t seem appropriate for her mood most of the time.
    “Well, you’ve said it now, so joke or not you’ve upset me,” Amber said.  She flounced into the utility room to collect Ernie’s lead from a hook on the wall. 
    “Are you taking him for a walk?” Jake asked, leaning against the door frame watching Amber.
    Amber’s hand paused in mid-air.  Was he trying to be funny, or was he genuinely stupid?  Evidently Amber’s filter wasn’t working either because she formed those exact words out loud. 
    “I’m just trying to make fucking conversation,” Jake replied, throwing his hands in the air.  “Just give me a break will you?”
    Amber could see that from the fire in Jake’s eyes that he was genuinely aggrieved.  “Yes,” she replied with a sigh, “I’m taking him for a walk.”
    “I’ll come with you,” Jake said, a huge grin appearing on his face, his anger quickly forgotten.  “It’ll be nice to get some fresh air.”
    Amber swung around to face him.  “There’s no need, I can go on my own.  I’m quite capable.”  She couldn’t think of anything worse that trying to make small talk with Jake while Ernie trotted along, emitting record breaking farts with every