Rise of the Retics Read Free

lens and was examining the pear for bruising. Dwarves were well known for being a bit cautious about anything that involved spending their own money. Regardless, Jaxon couldn’t figure out how he was able to completely ignore the horrific sounds coming out of Elmira’s mouth, yet the diligent customer continued to give his full and complete attention to the fruit in his hand.
    “I think I understand why the other dryads send her off to the markets each day, Rig , ” Jaxon said to the young dog as she trotted next to him, “they must just need a break from her voice.” As usual, Jaxon’s joke made him laugh. Of all the things in the world that Jaxon hated, his own sense of humor was definitely not one of them. Rigby cocked her head and gave him a questioning glance, as he slowed to catch his breath from laughter.
    Suddenly, Jaxon was snapped away from enjoying his humorous comment by another intense gurgle from his abdomen. He decided that now would be a fabulous time to strike. As he passed by the fruit stand he checked one last time to make sure Elmira was still completely engaged in her rant to the dwarf, who now had the pear on a tiny scale while he measured its dimensions with a tailor’s tape. Convinced that she was sufficiently distracted, Jaxon let out two quick, high-pitched whistles in succession.
    Understanding her master’s command, Rigby’s ears perked straight up. The young dog threw her head back and let out a huge roof that grabbed the attention of everyone in the immediate area. It even caused the dwarf to take his eyes off his possible pear purchase to check out the commotion. It was lucky he did so, as Rigby’s pouncing form heading directly toward his chest was far more interesting than any fruit [3] .
    He tried desperately to put his hands up to defend himself, but Rigby’s speed was unmatched by any elderly shopper. While that wasn’t a bit of information that anyone was going to brag about, it was a fact nonetheless.
    She hit him square between the shoulders, her thick skull [4] violently colliding with the bottom of the dwarf’s bearded jaw, and sending him sprawling backward into a basket full of bright green prickly pears.
    It was at that point that the cacophony of the morning market was overshadowed by three distinct sounds: Elmira’s terrified, panicky shriek of “my pears, my innocent pears,” the dwarf’s cries of pain when his bottom was turned into a pin cushion by the formerly innocent looking fruit basket, and Rigby’s deep excited bark that she let out whenever she was enjoying one of the “games” Jaxon had taught her.              
    It was the perfect distraction. As all eyes went to the triad of noisemakers, Jaxon knew that there wouldn’t be a soul looking at him for a few seconds. As he slowly strolled toward the chaotic scene, he darted his hand twice into a bushel of plump oranges, grabbing two beautiful specimens he had already eyed up. Before anyone knew he was even there, his hand had shot back into his side satchel, dropping his prizes into the bag for later claim. Too easy , he thought as he put a smile on his face and continued at a leisurely pace past Elmira.
    As Jaxon grabbed Rigby, gently pulling her away from the dwarf, whom she had begun licking incessantly on the face as he tried to stand up, he gave everyone a big smile and a less than sincere apology. Elmira’s only reaction was a  slow rotation of her head from left to right, as she followed each step Jaxon took past her stand, waiting for him to leave her area. Jaxon walked a little slower, as he fought to stifle his laughter, just to add a bit more to her annoyance.
    He could hear the dwarf, derriere still overflowing the pear bushel, mutter something about a “dirty mutt.” He was going to turn and say something to defend his dog’s honor, but when he looked around he noticed the dwarf wasn’t talking about Rigby, he was looking straight at him. Jaxon was the target of the