Oleanna: A Play Read Free Page A

wax my car. And yet, I go before the Great Tenure Committee, and I have an urge, to
vomit
, to, to, to puke my
badness
on the table, to show them: “I’m no good. Why would you pick me?”
    CAROL : They granted you tenure.
    JOHN : Oh no, they announced it, but they haven’t
signed
. Do you see? “At any moment …”
    CAROL : … mmm …
    JOHN : “They might not
sign
” … I might not … the
house
might not go through … Eh? Eh? They’ll find out my “dark secret.” (
Pause
)
    CAROL : … what is it …?
    JOHN : There
isn’t
one. But
they
will find an index of my badness …
    CAROL : Index?
    JOHN : A “… pointer.” A “Pointer.” You see? Do you see? I
understand
you. I. Know. That. Feeling. Am I entitled to my job, and my nice
home
, and my
wife
, and my
family
, and so on. This is what I’m saying: That theory of education which, that
theory:
    CAROL : I … I … (
Pause
)
    JOHN : What?
    CAROL : I …
    JOHN : What?
    CAROL : I want to know about my grade. (
Long pause
)
    JOHN : Of course you do.
    CAROL : Is that bad?
    JOHN : No.
    CAROL : Is it bad that I asked you that?
    JOHN : No.
    CAROL : Did I upset you?
    JOHN : No. And I apologize. Of
course
you want to know about your grade. And, of course, you can’t concentrate on anyth … (
The telephone starts to ring.
) Wait a moment.
    CAROL : I should go.
    JOHN : I’ll make you a deal.
    CAROL : No, you have to …
    JOHN : Let it ring. I’ll make you a deal. You stay here. We’ll start the whole course over. I’m going to say it was not you, it was I who was not paying attention. We’ll start the whole course over. Your grade is an “A.” Your final grade is an “A.” (
The phone stops ringing.
)
    CAROL : But the class is only half over …
    JOHN (
simultaneously with
“over”): Your grade for the whole term is an “A.” If you will come back and meet with me. A few more times. Your grade’s an “A.” Forget about the paper. You didn’t like it, you didn’t like writing it. It’s not important.What’s important is that I awake your interest, if I can, and that I answer your questions. Let’s start over. (
Pause
)
    CAROL : Over. With what?
    JOHN : Say this is the beginning.
    CAROL : The beginning.
    JOHN : Yes.
    CAROL : Of what?
    JOHN : Of the class.
    CAROL : But we can’t start over.
    JOHN : I say we can. (
Pause
) I say we can.
    CAROL : But I don’t believe it.
    JOHN : Yes, I know that. But it’s true. What is The Class but you and me? (
Pause
)
    CAROL : There are rules.
    JOHN : Well. We’ll break them.
    CAROL : How can we?
    JOHN : We won’t tell anybody.
    CAROL : Is that all right?
    JOHN : I say that it’s fine.
    CAROL : Why would you do this for me?
    JOHN : I like you. Is that so difficult for you to …
    CAROL : Um …
    JOHN : There’s no one here but you and me. (
Pause
)
    CAROL : All right. I did not understand. When you referred …
    JOHN : All right, yes?
    CAROL : When you referred to hazing.
    JOHN : Hazing.
    CAROL : You wrote, in your book. About the comparative … the comparative … (
She checks her notes.
)
    JOHN : Are you checking your notes …?
    CAROL : Yes.
    JOHN : Tell me in your own …
    CAROL : I want to make sure that I have it right.
    JOHN : No. Of course. You want to be exact.
    CAROL : I want to know everything that went on.
    JOHN : … that’s good.
    CAROL : … so I …
    JOHN : That’s very good. But I was suggesting, many times, that that which we wish to retain is retained oftentimes, I think,
better
with less expenditure of effort.
    CAROL : (
Of notes
) Here it is: you wrote of
hazing
.
    JOHN : … that’s correct. Now: I said “hazing.” It means ritualized annoyance. We shove this book at you, we say read it. Now, you say you’ve read it? I think that you’re
lying
. I’ll
grill
you, and when I find you’ve lied, you’ll be disgraced, and your life will be ruined. It’s a sick game. Why do we do it? Does it educate? In no sense. Well, then, what is higher