Mrs. Dole Is Out of Control! Read Free

told him. “You can come back up now.”

5
Getting Ready for the Big Day
    It was the last week of school, so we hardly learned anything. That was fine with me, because learning stuff is boring. But it was hard to concentrate. I kept thinking how in a few days we would be off for the summer.
    Mrs. Daisy wasn’t concentrating either.She had a new hobby—knitting! She pretty much sat in the back of the room knitting while Ryan’s mom helped us get ready for graduation. Sometimes Andrea’s mom came in, too. But she spent most of the time rolling her eyes. Boy, she sure rolls her eyes a lot. Eye rolling must run in Andrea’s family.

    We had to do all kinds of stuff to get ready for graduation. Did you know that when you graduate, you have to wear a weird cap on your head that’sshaped like a square? Nobody knows why. Mrs. Dole asked our art teacher, Ms. Hannah, to help us make the caps out of construction paper and cardboard. Ms. Hannah also helped us make graduation banners and signs to decorate the hallway.
    On Thursday Mrs. Dole had us march from the gym to the playground behind the school so we would learn how to make a grand entrance for our parents. She made us practice over and over again until we got it right.
    Did you ever hear of the graduation song? It’s this song they always play at graduations. Mrs. Dole asked our music teacher, Mr. Loring, to play that song onan accordion while we marched around the playground. He told us the real name of the song is “Pomp and Circumstance,” but nobody knows why.
    The song doesn’t have words. It goes like this:
    Dum, dum-dum-dum, dum dum,
    Dum, dum-dum-dum, dum.
    Dum, dum-dum, dum-dum-dum,
    Dum, dum-dum-dum-dum.
    It’s a dumb song, if you ask me. Songs are supposed to have words. So I made up words to the graduation song. They go like this:
    I’m gra-ad-u-a-ting,
    There’s a square on my head.
    Why is there a square on my head?
    Be-cause I’m grad-u-a-ting.
    You repeat that over and over again. While we were marching around the playground, I taught the words to everybody. Soon the whole class was singing. It was cool. Then Mrs. Dole told us to knock it off.
    Practicing for graduation all morning was boring. I couldn’t wait for lunch. Finally, after a million hundred hours, Mrs. Dole said it was time to go to thevomitorium to eat.
    I sat at a table with the guys. Michael tried to juggle his Tater Tots. Neil the nude kid put cookies over his eyes. Ryan let us pour salt on his tongue. Andrea and her annoying friends sat at the next table talking about girly stuff, like what color dressestheir dolls like to wear.

    â€œWhat are you guys doing over the summer?” asked Ryan.
    â€œI’m going to sleepaway camp,” said Neil.
    â€œI’m going to football camp,” said Michael.
    â€œI’m going to cooking camp,” said Ryan.
    â€œMy family is going to rent a house at the beach,” I said.
    I didn’t ask Andrea what she would be doing over the summer. She was probably going to learn her multiplication tables so she would be smarter than everybody in third grade.
    Andrea was sitting there all quiet. Ifigured she was still mad because her mom lost the PTA election.
    â€œAre you still mad because your mom lost the PTA election?” I asked her.
    â€œNo,” Andrea said. “I’m worried about Mrs. Daisy.”
    â€œWhat about her?” asked Emily, all concerned.
    â€œHaven’t you noticed?” Andrea said. “Mrs. Daisy has put on a lot of weight. She’s getting fat.”
    â€œIt must be all those bonbons we gave her,” said Neil the nude kid.
    â€œShe’s probably eating a box every night,” Ryan said.
    â€œThat’s not good for her,” said Emily.
    â€œIt’s all your fault, Arlo,” Andrea said. “You were the one who thought of giving her bonbons.”
    Why is everything always my fault? I didn’t force Mrs.