Moving On Without You Read Free

just in case it might happen."
    "Tracy, it does not just happen like that. Do
you even have a boyfriend?"
    Terry hadn't said what they were. They hung out
and talked on the phone, but they didn't discuss any titles or rules. Tracy
knew he didn't belong to her.
    "No."
    "So what do you need it for? That's a waste
of time. You're not ready for sex."
    It had taken a lot to muster up the courage to
start this conversation and Tracy did not feel comfortable pressing the issue.
Her mother wasn't going to understand this without her explaining what was
really going on and that probably would not turn out well. No words could
really make it sound right so Tracy gave up the idea of her mother walking her
into their family gynecologists' office and asking for a pill pack.
    The whole thing seemed a lot simpler in her head,
but once the conversation began she realized how ridiculous it must seem from
her mother's perspective. Her school counselor had advised her to start taking
the pill before sex in order to prevent pregnancy, but her mother was not going
for it.
    After a day of deliberation without any change in
her mind she recruited Sean to accompany her to the nearest free clinic. The
billboards were posted around town, the posters were on the sides of busses,
and the commercials were coming on the radio. It was worth a try. She had heard
some nasty rumors about the condition of these clinics, but she did not have
many other options available.
    The two friends took the city bus downtown to the
nearest clinic that allowed walk-ins. Upon arrival a receptionist gave her a
clipboard with a stack of papers and a pen connected by a string and rubber
band. Before the paperwork was complete, they were calling her to a room in the
back.
    The walls of the clinic were white and clean. It
was set up a lot like her pediatrician's office, but instead of posters with
the food groups and inner ear diagrams there were pictures of the male and
female reproductive systems.
    Sitting on the cushioned table top with a paper
gown covering her underwear she waited for a staff member to rap on the door.
The door swung open to show a short, middle-aged woman extending her hand out
to the girl. Tracy shook her hand and smiled back. The woman looked through her
chart and asked a few questions Tracy had already checked on the sheet.
    "How many sexual partners have you had?"
    "None."
    "Why do you want birth control?"
    "I think I might have sex soon."
    The woman looked just as confused as her mother
had when she asked her that question the day before. Everyone was making her
feel like an idiot for protecting herself. Wasn't this the way she was supposed
to do it? The nurse practitioner scribbled on the clipboard, but Tracy couldn't
decipher anything from where she was sitting.
    After checking Tracy's blood pressure, heart rate,
and pressing on her stomach she sat back down to write a few more notes on the
chart.
    "Okay what kind of birth control would you
like?"
    "What kind do you have?"
    "Well there is a whole list of contraceptives
you should consider."
    The woman passed her a brochure with a table of
methods along with their success rates. Tracy felt like she should have looked
some of this up before coming in. She had no idea there were so many choices.
How did other girls choose?
    "What do you recommend?" Tracy asked.
    "I often ask my patients this: Do you really
think you can remember to take a pill at the same time every single day?"
    Up until that moment Tracy did not know you had to
take the pill at the same time every day. Did anyone actually remember to do
that?
    "Probably not."
    "Okay well you might want to try the shot.
You only have to come in for a shot once every three months and you're fine in
between. I still recommend that you use condoms, but as far as birth control
that is a safe bet for younger people."
    "So I just have to come for the shot once
every three months? That works?"
    "Of course! They all work. Any choice on this
list is fine if