Lulu in LA LA Land Read Free

on—
    LULU
    (interrupting)
    Lex, I don’t like blockbuster movies. And I don’t have thirty girlfriends.
    ALEXIS
    OK. Next.
    (thinks for a milli-moment)
    Got it! Disco dance party. I’ll set up an outside dance floor. Fiona has done that tons of times here. I’ll score a hot DJ. I’ll check out who just did Amanda Sasson’s hot shots party last weekend. That DJ rocked.
    LULU
    I wasn’t there.
    ALEXIS
    Well, everyone who matters was there.
    CHIP
    I was there.
    Chip has been listening in on the conversation as he pushes a long sweeper across the length of the pool’s bottom.
    ALEXIS
    (calls out to Chip)
    You were? But you’re, well, a little older than the crowd that was there.
    CHIP
    (in a flat, relaxed tone)
    Working extra jobs. Surfing’s an expensive habit. Besides cleaning pools, I pass around appetizers for a caterer. Ya know, all that time riding a board, I’ve got balance. I can hold two trays of soy-encrusted cucumber and pick up dirty plates at the same time.
    LULU
    Mega yuck! What’s soy crusty cucumber like?

    CUT!! Gotta tell you something funny about Chip. He’s nut-o about eating a strict vegetarian diet. But I swear on a stack of cookbooks that I once saw him on Venice Beach eating a hot dog. I’ve never mentioned it to anyone, not even him, because, geez peas, what’s so awful about a little hot dog here and there…and, besides, I’d never want to embarrass him. Back to: ACTION!!
    LULU
    (to Alexis)
    Doesn’t Robbie surf?
    (to Chip)
    He’s her new boyfriend.
    ALEXIS
    (annoyed)
    Can we get back to the party business?
    CHIP
    How ’bout a pool party? I’ll make sure there’s not a bee’s wing in the water. I’ll skim it crystal clear.
    ALEXIS
    Thanks, Chip, but, no! Pool party is way overdone.
    Alexis faces Lulu, up close and personal.
    ALEXIS
    Lulu, what fab parties have YOU been to lately?
    LULU
    (voice trails off)
    Well, you know…
    ALEXIS
    No, I don’t. That’s why I’m asking.
    LULU
    I don’t go to many parties, Lex. Just not invited too much. And it’s fine because I wouldn’t want to go.
    ALEXIS
    That’s just weird of you.
    LULU
    Wait, I did just go to the greatest Easter party. Sophia and her mom invited me, and we painted giant chocolate eggs with colored icing.
    ALEXIS
    â€™K, halt! Not getting anywhere. Slam on the brakes.
    LULU
    I have a birthday party planned. Geez peas! Sophia’s gonna come and Elana…and Chip!
    (calling out to Chip)
    You should come too. And, Lex, believe it or not, I want you if you can slide me into your social schedule. And Robbie, if you guys are still going out. And most of all, Mom and Dad, and that’s—
    ALEXIS
    (interrupting)
    Your problem! You’re NOT, NO WAY going to get Linc and Fiona to a make-your-own-taco birthday dinner. They’re too busy. It’s gotta be a smashy-flashy party that they WANT to attend. Lulu, you throw parties that are fun for your guests!
    Lulu is unable to respond for a minute. Alexis’s words sting her ears.
    LULU
    It’s not a make-your-own-taco party! I wanted to make garden-grown, homemade salsa. I wanted to make mini pizzas. I wanted to make mac and cheese from scratch. I wanted—
    ALEXIS
    Linc and Fiona to come, right?
    LULU
    (very quietly)
    Yes.
    ALEXIS
    Got it, gal. Gonna take this one over. I’ll be your party planner.
    RING TONE MUSIC BLARES. It’s Alexis’s phone. Alexis answers.
    ALEXIS
    (into phone, animated)
    Oooooh, fabby that you called to remind me! I’ll get driven right over.
    Alexis disconnects and slips her feet into her leopard print slide thong sandals. Her salad’s barely touched.
    ALEXIS
    (to Lulu)
    Nail appointment. Mani-pedi.
    Realizing that she’s about to make a quick getaway, Alexis musters a tiny stab of kindness for her little sister.
    ALEXIS
    Wanna come?
    Lulu looks at her salsa-damp fingertips. She unconsciously stuffs them