get away. This wasn't the first time I tried to come up with a plan. However, I felt like this was the last chance I would get. Over the months, I tried to connect with the mysterious man in my dreams, but since my turning, he had been missing in action. I guessed I would be on my own with this one. I got up and began to pace the short length of my confined little room. Maybe walking would get my brain going.
Thirty minutes later, nothing. All I could think about was Mark and how pissed he had looked. Okay, so if I did somehow get him to turn on Mitch and help me get out, where would I go? Well, I would have to find Reid. Then what? Ugh! This is impossible!
I moved the plates off the mattress and placed them by the door. I went to sit on the bed. Cupping my hands, I did the only thing I could: I pulled my lightning from my core. In my cupped hands, there sat a tennis ball-sized ball of lightning. It snapped and popped with arcs of electricity in between my palms. This would be enough to nearly kill a human. But, it merely tickled me. With a good deal of concentration, I pulled the lightning back within me and focused on the storm of power inside of me.
I’d done this a lot over the last months. Since my turning, there had been a great disturbance in the force. Okay yes, I know, a quote from Star Wars , but that's how it felt. I felt like the power I held when I was a witch was only a fraction compared to the well of power that was in me now. This amount of power had proven to be difficult to tame. As if one really could tame lightning. I repeated this practice for hours. I barely noticed when Mark returned for the dishes and to drop off my dinner.
He eyed me with caution when he saw what I was doing.
I sighed and said while pulling my power to one hand, tossing the ball of lightning in the air and catching it, “You know, Mark, I really am a nice person. I have been forced into a situation I can do nothing about. And the man I love is gone. Being kept somewhere.” I stopped tossing the ball of lightning and pulled it back into me, feeling it settle deep within my core. I walked over to him and he tensed as though he just knew I would lay his ass out.
“How would you feel, Mark? How would you feel if Mitch had done this to your female?”
I took the plates from him and set them on the edge of the bed and turned to face him. He stood there thinking. And that shocked the hell out of me. He genuinely was thinking about my words.
He met my eyes and just before he looked away he said in a low tone, “I would fight at every turn.”
He turned and walked out. I stood there gaping for the second time today. I now had one week until the new moon when I would be at my weakest, but so would all the other wolves. That would be the best time for me to try anything to get out of here. I had a good feeling about this, this time. Mark was my ticket out of here. Now, I just had to figure out how to make him play ball. I was sick of feeling sorry for myself. I wanted out of this miserable situation. So, I had to get myself out. Then I needed to find Reid. I was not the damsel in this story and I would never be. Time to pull up the big girl panties and save my own ass.
THE DEPRESSION I feel is so overwhelming, I think it may swallow me whole.
My heart hurt.
Maybe it’s not even a heart anymore, maybe it’s just a huge gaping hole with nothing there.
I’d never been a man who expressed emotion or feelings in an outward manner, but these emotions and pure self-loathing were crippling. I closed my eyes and all I could see was her. Her blood-spattered white dress. Her mangled neck. She’d said, "I love you." And I tried to rage and roar to save her. In the end, all I accomplished was not being able to tell her I loved her back.
Had I done this? Had I set all of these events in motion? Had I not protected her? In the last four months, I’d asked myself these questions over and over again. I always went back and
Thirty minutes later, nothing. All I could think about was Mark and how pissed he had looked. Okay, so if I did somehow get him to turn on Mitch and help me get out, where would I go? Well, I would have to find Reid. Then what? Ugh! This is impossible!
I moved the plates off the mattress and placed them by the door. I went to sit on the bed. Cupping my hands, I did the only thing I could: I pulled my lightning from my core. In my cupped hands, there sat a tennis ball-sized ball of lightning. It snapped and popped with arcs of electricity in between my palms. This would be enough to nearly kill a human. But, it merely tickled me. With a good deal of concentration, I pulled the lightning back within me and focused on the storm of power inside of me.
I’d done this a lot over the last months. Since my turning, there had been a great disturbance in the force. Okay yes, I know, a quote from Star Wars , but that's how it felt. I felt like the power I held when I was a witch was only a fraction compared to the well of power that was in me now. This amount of power had proven to be difficult to tame. As if one really could tame lightning. I repeated this practice for hours. I barely noticed when Mark returned for the dishes and to drop off my dinner.
He eyed me with caution when he saw what I was doing.
I sighed and said while pulling my power to one hand, tossing the ball of lightning in the air and catching it, “You know, Mark, I really am a nice person. I have been forced into a situation I can do nothing about. And the man I love is gone. Being kept somewhere.” I stopped tossing the ball of lightning and pulled it back into me, feeling it settle deep within my core. I walked over to him and he tensed as though he just knew I would lay his ass out.
“How would you feel, Mark? How would you feel if Mitch had done this to your female?”
I took the plates from him and set them on the edge of the bed and turned to face him. He stood there thinking. And that shocked the hell out of me. He genuinely was thinking about my words.
He met my eyes and just before he looked away he said in a low tone, “I would fight at every turn.”
He turned and walked out. I stood there gaping for the second time today. I now had one week until the new moon when I would be at my weakest, but so would all the other wolves. That would be the best time for me to try anything to get out of here. I had a good feeling about this, this time. Mark was my ticket out of here. Now, I just had to figure out how to make him play ball. I was sick of feeling sorry for myself. I wanted out of this miserable situation. So, I had to get myself out. Then I needed to find Reid. I was not the damsel in this story and I would never be. Time to pull up the big girl panties and save my own ass.
THE DEPRESSION I feel is so overwhelming, I think it may swallow me whole.
My heart hurt.
Maybe it’s not even a heart anymore, maybe it’s just a huge gaping hole with nothing there.
I’d never been a man who expressed emotion or feelings in an outward manner, but these emotions and pure self-loathing were crippling. I closed my eyes and all I could see was her. Her blood-spattered white dress. Her mangled neck. She’d said, "I love you." And I tried to rage and roar to save her. In the end, all I accomplished was not being able to tell her I loved her back.
Had I done this? Had I set all of these events in motion? Had I not protected her? In the last four months, I’d asked myself these questions over and over again. I always went back and
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