Light and Wine Read Free

searching her memory.
    “Love does no harm to its neighbor.   Therefore” –I squeeze her fingers with my own, thankful for, proud of, and so fallen into the precious heart that pulses faster at my touch– “Love is the fulfillment of the law.”
    I watch as beautiful little wings surrender, and the shy corners of her lips dare to curve up once more.
    With her nod, t empered care and cogent need of my own course through my veins. I hold her as close as I can, pressing my heartbeat to hers in effort to show her that what’s between us is God’s gift, and there is no wrong in rejoicing in His giving.   I want so much for the rhythm rushing through me to assure her that perfect love casts out fear and doubt, and that absolution had been granted long before she asked.
    Her lungs expand between my palm and my own heart as her head sways to the side. She squeezes my hand in turn, and I hear exactly what she’s saying.
    She’s welcoming me home.  
    Shifting my feet along the carpet, I close my eyes, too, counting the near to trembling blessings that fit flawlessly in my arms.
    “Agna, carissima, delicia,” I whisper, lamb, beloved, darling, as I press my lips just under her ear, cradling her body with mine.
    She shakes in my arms, and for a moment it feels like she might sob, but she holds steady, breathing shallow, quick breaths into the chest that’s struggling to contain a heart that knows when love is near.
    Wholly moved, I bring my right hand over both of hers.
    “Fulfill His sacrament, love.”
    “Oh—” It comes out like a sigh, the words slipping transparent and breathless from her. “Oh, my God.”
    Lids closed, but easily now, she’s almost entirely still and just above silent.
    “I am heartily sorry for having offended Thee,” she continues, all of the tension in her against me. “I detest all of my sins because of Thy just—”
    Pausing, she swallows again, her chest rising and falling under our hands.
    “Because of Thy just punishments, but most of all because they offend Thee, my God, who art good and deserving of all my love.”
    Calm covers me with her voice, washing over me like a clean breeze. I close my eyes and breathe her in, basking in perfect, plenary light. My arms relax, and I rest my forehead against the side of hers, loving.

“I firmly resolve, with the help of Thy grace, to sin no more,” she whispers, holding on.
    Her reconciliation is full. Relief I can sense starts between her shoulders, pouring out over her chest. I feel it in each of her legs, pressed along each of mine, and I hear it compose a breath, right before she says, “Amen.”
    Bringing my arms down around her waist, I gather and hold her the way I craved to when she first sat down.
    “Through the ministry of His holy Church, I grant you pardon and absolution from your sins,” I whisper.   Brushing my nose up her neck and along her cheek, I give unspoken thanks for her tender scent afresh. “In the name of the Father, the Son, and—”
    “Lacie?” her mother’s voice calls from downstairs. “Father Marc?   Dinner’s ready.”
    I close my eyelids tighter instead of opening them. I know a floor below us plates are being placed next to silverware lying in wait, beside glasses of water and wine. It’s time for me to let her go, but I don’t lift my lids until nearly forgiven relaxes herself fully against my chest and nudges my jaw with her nose.
    It fills me with gratitude and brings joy to my lips.
    “And the Holy Spirit,” I whisper, kissing her temple.
    With a nod and a mindfully measured exhale, she smiles as I return my eyes to hers. There’s a tremble in her lips though, and needy unfulfillment in her eyes. She’s giving every effort inside to pull herself together, and I know that each breath bringing essential oxygen to her veins is and will be for me.
    “Wait for me?” I ask just above a whisper.

Her nodding increases , unquestioning, and after a blink, she opens her hazel eyes once