Letting Hearts Heal Read Free Page A

captive a beat too long to be called comfortable, Dean took a deep breath. “I didn’t know about Wyatt until four weeks ago.”
    At that Mason looked up from where he’d been studying the pillow next to him on the couch. “What?”
    Leaning back in the chair, Dean prepared himself to put it into words for the first time. “I didn’t have an easy time coming to terms with the fact that I’m gay. I’m sure you remember that. Looking back, I think most of it was knowing I’d let down the generations of Walkers who worked so hard to keep this ranch in the family. Knowing it would end with me, being an only child and gay… it didn’t sit well with me.”
    “So you went out and had a kid to keep the ranch in the family?”
    “God, no. If I’d been straight and knowing I’d want to get married, have kids, and all that, I probably never would have had the courage to make so many changes around here. I’d have wanted to leave behind what I’d inherited.
    “No. Wyatt happened because I was uncertain. Everything was so clear with you around, but after you left, the old doubts returned. Then one night after I’d had too much to drink, it seemed like a good idea to… make sure. So I had a one-night stand—a quite horrible one if I remember correctly—with a woman. The result was that I knew for sure that I was gay… and Wyatt.”
    Mason nodded like it made sense to him, which surprised Dean. It didn’t completely make sense to him.
    “But the woman didn’t tell you she was pregnant?”
    Dean shook his head. “No. And she knew who I was because she had a will made after Wyatt was born where she named guardians in case something ever happened to her. She also named me as the father. Then last month she was killed in a car accident. The sheriff and a social worker showed up with Wyatt. Diana had some family, but no one who wanted to take care of Wyatt. I’m pretty much the last person on earth who should have a kid. I work too much, half the time I forget he’s around, and I don’t know a damn thing about kids. But I’m all he has, you know? I couldn’t turn him away even though he’d probably be better off somewhere else.”
    “If you care enough to take him in, then I’m not sure he’s better off with someone else.”
    “Maybe I cared about my own conscience more than I cared about him.” Dean sighed. “Sometimes I don’t even know.”
    “I don’t believe that. If your conscience was that strict, you’d have gotten married, had a couple of kids—on purpose, even—and carried this place on like your dad and granddad.” Mason shook his head. “No. You took one look at that little boy and knew he was yours. That’s responsibility—and possibly something a lot stronger that you haven’t even realized yet. Dean, the kid is adorable.”
    “But I don’t understand him. He’s nothing like me when I was a kid. He walks around puddles. Walks around them. I’m pretty sure I was learning to drive before I managed to walk around a puddle and not jump into it. He’s quiet all the time—never says much, never makes any noise, hardly ever makes a mess. Did you know that today when you were chasing him before dinner was the first time I’ve ever heard him laugh? Four weeks in the same house and not one laugh. And the fucking peas. God… I’m the worst dad in the world. Actually, I shouldn’t even be allowed to call myself a dad.”
    When Mason said nothing, Dean looked up to see him trying to contain his laughter. He was unsuccessful and soon howling. Dean was slightly amused but tried not to show it. He just waited and enjoyed the sound he’d been missing for so long.
    “Shit, Dean,” Mason finally managed to say, his face turning serious. “Just because the kid looks like you doesn’t mean he’s your clone. He has his own personality. And maybe he really is like you normally. He’s just lost his mom, and everything is as new to him as it is to you, except that he doesn’t understand