[Lanen Kaelar 01] - Song in the Silence Read Free

forgive him for siding with Hadron in keeping me
caged. It did not help that even as a child I found him dull and a little slow.
All his thoughts were of the farm; his one fond wish had ever been to become as
good a breeder and trainer of horses as his uncle. He had not known what his
place would be when Hadron died, but since working for me did not seem to
concern him I never mentioned it.
    Hadron’s death came just as he was starting to
prepare for the Great Fair, and with him gone there was more to do than hands
to do it. There were a good dozen of the horses old enough, broken in and ready
to be sold this year. Hadron and Jamie had always gone to Illara, but Hadron’s
part now fell to me as the heir. If I had been a little less tired I would have
been delighted at the prospect of finally seeing the King’s Seat of Ilsa. As it
was, grief and weariness outweighed all else. I did not pretend to mourn Hadron
greatly, but I felt his loss, and grieved quietly to myself that I had cared so
little for my own father. In great part, though, I must admit that I felt a
weary weight lifted from my shoulders.
    I could see no further than that until the night
before we left, when my eyes began to open.        .
    The horses had just been brought into the barn
for the night. We would have to rise early to begin the journey—the fair was in
a fortnight’s time and we would travel most of that, Jamie and I and the three
farmhands who were coming to help with the horses. Still, the night before
leaving had always been exciting even when I was not going on the journey; a
time of ending and beginning, full of promise and change. Jamie had already
gone to his bed and the other hands to their lodging. Walther and I had just
finished the last chores; and I was trudging across the paving stones of the
court yard when he laid a hand on my arm and stopped me in the torchlight,
saying he had something to ask me. .
    “What is it?” I asked, wondering why we had to
stop walking. I was filthy and exhausted and wanted a bath and my bed in the
worst way…
    “Lanen, I—it’s been six weeks since Hadron
died. There’s been no man around here but me to look after you, and …”
    He had to wait while I laughed. “You’ve a
curious sense of things, Walther. None but Jamie has looked after me for twenty
years. Why should someone start because Hadron died? Besides, I’ve yet to meet
a man who wanted the honour, and none I wished to give it to.” I moved on
towards the house.
    “What about me?” said Walther loudly.
    That stopped me.
    “What about you?” I asked as kindly as
I could, turning back to face him. All women have a sense that warms them of
such things. I was shocked—he was all but betrothed to Alisonde from the
village—but I could smell it coming and was desperately trying to think of how
to get out of it without being too mean. I didn’t like him, but some things
demand mercy.
    “Marry me, Lanen,” he said quietly,
moving close to me. He smelt of the stables even stronger than I did.
“I’ll not pretend there’s more between us than there is, and I—I’ll not
demand a husband’s rights, but you need a man to look after—to run the place
for you. You know everything I do, but you haven’t the touch.”
    That was true enough. I never was interested in
horses the way he was, certainly, save perhaps when a mare was in labour.
Still, even in my anger I nearly smiled to myself. Poor Walther always thought
he was so subtle.
    “Walther, this is so sudden,” I said,
unable to keep an edge from my voice. “What would Alisonde say? She
deserves better of you than this.”
    He looked down. “She will understand.”
    If it had been morning, broad daylight, I might
have held my peace and simply refused him; in the flickering torchlight at the
end of a long day I let my armour slip. “Aye,” I sneered. “She
loves you well enough to take a mistress’ place, as long as you never behave as
true husband to your wife.