How to Win Friends and Influence People Read Free Page A

So, if you desire
    to master the principles you are studying in this
    book, do something about them. Apply these rules at
    every opportunity. If you don’t you will forget them
    quickly. Only knowledge that is used sticks in your
    mind.

    You will probably find it difficult to apply these suggestions
    all the time. I know because I wrote the book,
    and yet frequently I found it difficult to apply everything
    I advocated. For example, when you are displeased, it is
    much easier to criticize and condemn than it is to try to
    understand the other person’s viewpoint. It is frequently
    easier to find fault than to find praise. It is more natural
    to talk about what vou want than to talk about what the
    other person wants. And so on, So, as you read this book,
    remember that you are not merely trying to acquire information.
    You are attempting to form new habits. Ah
    yes, you are attempting a new way of life. That will require
    time and persistence and daily application.

    So refer to these pages often. Regard this as a working
    handbook on human relations; and whenever you are
    confronted with some specific problem - such as handling
    a child, winning your spouse to your way of thinking,
    or satisfying an irritated customer - hesitate about
    doing the natural thing, the impulsive thing. This is usually
    wrong. Instead, turn to these pages and review the
    paragraphs you have underscored. Then try these new
    ways and watch them achieve magic for you.

    7. Offer your spouse, your child or some business
    associate a dime or a dollar every time he or she catches
    you violating a certain principle. Make a lively game out
    of mastering these rules.

    8. The president of an important Wall Street bank
    once described, in a talk before one of my classes, a
    highly efficient system he used for self-improvement.
    This man had little formal schooling; yet he had become
    one of the most important financiers in America, and he
    confessed that he owed most of his success to the constant
    application of his homemade system. This is what
    he does, I’ll put it in his own words as accurately as I
    can remember.

    “For years I have kept an engagement book showing
    all the appointments I had during the day. My family
    never made any plans for me on Saturday night, for the
    family knew that I devoted a part of each Saturday evening
    to the illuminating process of self-examination and
    review and appraisal. After dinner I went off by myself,
    opened my engagement book, and thought over all the
    interviews, discussions and meetings that had taken
    place during the week. I asked myself:

    ‘What mistakes did I make that time?’
    ‘What did I do that was right-and in what way
    could I have improved my performance?’
    ‘What lessons can I learn from that experience?’

    “I often found that this weekly review made me very
    unhappy. I was frequently astonished at my own blunders.
    Of course, as the years passed, these blunders became
    less frequent. Sometimes I was inclined to pat
    myself on the back a little after one of these sessions.
    This system of self-analysis, self-education, continued
    year after year, did more for me than any other one thing
    I have ever attempted.

    “It helped me improve my ability to make decisions
     - and it aided me enormously in all my contacts with
    people. I cannot recommend it too highly.”

    Why not use a similar system to check up on your
    application of the principles discussed in this book? If
    you do, two things will result.

    First, you will find yourself engaged in an educational
    process that is both intriguing and priceless.

    Second, you will find that your ability to meet and
    deal with people will grow enormously.

    9. You will find at the end of this book several blank
    pages on which you should record your triumphs in the
    application of these principles. Be specific. Give names,
    dates, results. Keeping such a record will inspire you to
    greater efforts; and how fascinating these entries will