How To Be a Boy Read Free

“His fucking boyfriend?”
    The whole room bursts into laughter. The tap has been turned back on. There’s a horrible sinking feeling in my guts. I’m the target now, not Dale.
    I look around. Nobody’s offering any support. Jordan and Liam might have been uncertain a few seconds ago, but they’re keeping right out of it now. I get the sense they’re vaguely with me, but the thing is, it’s hard to stand in the way of the bandwagon when it’s rolling flat-out. I feel helpless, powerless. But I know that if I’m going to go with this, I’m on my own. I open my mouth. No words come out.
    Jack Porter is still staring at me, challenging me.
    “So what’s it all about Luke?” he says. “You been getting in touch with your caring side?”
    There’s another ripple of laughter.
    I swallow. The hairs on the back of my neck are standing on end. I can feel myself going red. Thirty seconds ago I was just a face in the crowd. Anonymous. Now I’m right on the spot. I wanted to do what was right. I didn’t want this. I look over Jack’s shoulder. Behind him Dale Jarrett carries on undressing. He slips off his socks and stands up. He glances at me. If he knows I’m trying to do him a favour here, he’s not acknowledging it.
    Jack grins.
    “I’ve got an idea,” he says. He reaches into his rucksack, brings out a bottle of Radox and tosses it at me. “You’re such big mates with Dale, why don’t you get in the shower together? You can give him a nice soapy rub-down.”
    Instinctively, I catch the bottle and chuck it back.
    “Fuck off, Jack,” I say. I’m not trying to be aggressive, I’m just standing my ground.
    But Jack’s getting carried away.
    “You’re telling me to fuck off?” he says, stepping towards me. “You going to make me?”
    I can hardly believe what’s happening. This is surreal. Jack Porter wants a fight. But why? What’s his problem? This is just some changing-room bullshit, something about nothing, but he’s acting like I’ve called his mum a slag.
    My mind is whirling at a million miles an hour. I’ve never had a fight in my life, but I know how things go. Hit first and hit hardest, and usually that’s game over. I look at Jack, wild eyes fixed on me, and in that instant I suss out my chances if it kicks off between us. He’s quite broad, but he’s smaller than me. I could probably take him. But then what? I don’t want to be known as a hard man. That’s a lot more trouble than it’s worth. Still, at this moment, that’s just about the best scenario I can hope for.
    Nobody’s interested in Dale Jarrett any more. All eyes are on Jack and me. I suddenly realize that I don’t actually know a lot of these lads too well. We’re all just one term into our time at Ingleby, here from middle schools all over town. The pecking order isn’t set in stone yet. At my last place I was OK, somewhere near the top. But by opening my trap at the wrong time today, I might just have saddled myself with a new life down at the bottom. And for what? Dale Jarrett?
    Time seems to stand still. I’m almost nose-to-nose with Jack Porter now, but it’s all bravado. I don’t want a fight. And as I look into Jack’s eyes, I can see deep down that he doesn’t either. This is just a stupid bit of handbags that’s got out of hand. And someone needs to defuse the situation.
    I don’t really know where the inspiration comes from. It’s just a bolt from the blue. But it feels like exactly the right thing to do. Without warning, I reach out and grab Jack by the shoulders. Then I plant a big kiss slap-bang in the middle of his forehead. There’s a split second of stunned silence, and then the entire place explodes. Jack’s laughing, I’m laughing and the whole stand-off is history. As the laughter dies away, Jack nods in my direction and I nod back. Honours even.
    Jack turns round and I slump down onto the bench. My palms are wet with sweat and my heart is racing. Relief is coursing through me, but