Hold Me Close (Devil's Chariots Motorcycle Club Book 1) Read Free Page B

his neck, Johnny felt something that he didn't much like to feel.
     
    “’Night Beth.” He nodded, pulling away from her embrace, and walked out the door.
     
    ***
     
    The tears came out of nowhere. What the fuck was wrong with her? She had expected to be crying by the end of the day. But she'd had no reason to think it'd be over Johnny and not Dan.
     
    He didn't want her to hug him. He was uncomfortable. She could tell that much. And it'd hurt her. Why? Why was she that hurt over it?
     
    Clearing the dishes out of the room and cleaning up the kitchen helped to take her mind off of it. Yes, she would eventually want a man again. But not this soon. And not him. Not Johnny. He was Dan's best friend. That was wrong.
     
    Feeling this way was wrong. That's what she told herself all night.
     
    And then she cried until she fell asleep.
     

CHAPTER FOUR
     
    He'd drank until he couldn't see straight and it didn't help. He'd taken a hot little number back to the clubhouse and it didn't help. Nothing was helping. Nothing was stopping him from having the thoughts and feelings that he was having.
     
    She was next to him. The cute little vixen. Another redhead. What the fuck made him keep choosing redheads? He hadn't even really been attracted to her.
     
    Nothing about her excited him. Even when she'd stripped for him and shook her ass to that song. Nothing. She was just another girl. Another one in an endless line. Another name he wouldn't remember tomorrow.
     
    He wanted to wake her up and tell her to go home. He started to, and decided that he'd leave instead. The pounding in his head didn't feel up any kind of argument from her because she'd told herself he was the man of her dreams.
     
    Fuck that. He was nobody's dream. He was a nightmare. A waste of space on this planet. It should have been him and not Dan that was killed that night. Then Dan would be able to wrap his arms around Bethany and comfort her. Like he should. The way that Johnny couldn't. Even if he wanted to. Badly.
     
    ***
     
    Bethany sat up in the bed, her mind filled with the images from the dream she'd just had. Her body felt hot and flushed. Her face was likely a deep red from the embarrassment of what she was feeling. Her mind guilty.
     
    She sat there for a moment and tried to regain her composure. Why did that have to be a dream she could remember? Especially when it was so graphic. So real. So intense.
     
    Deciding that a drink sounded perfect, Bethany made her way downstairs. She hated herself for the way that she was feeling. She was getting far too attached to Johnny. It was like she needed him. Like she needed his approval and needed his presence in her life.
     
    And he gave it. All of it. He was there for her. The question she had was: Why? At first she'd thought it was because he needed her too. He was dealing with the same things she was. The same feelings. The same guilt.
     
    When they'd gotten close she thought maybe that was why. He wanted to. He had become attached to her as well. She had let herself believe that maybe he was there for her.
     
    Now she questioned it. She wondered if maybe he was still there simply out of obligation to his friend that was gone. Taking care of things for him. The way they all did.
     
    She sipped on the drink and wondered for the hundredth time that day why she cared so much and if it was completely wrong that she did.
     
    ***
     
    It's like it was habit. He'd headed out to ride around and clear his head. That, and to give the girl time to wake up and realize she may as well leave.
     
    Yet here he was. Outside her house. Wanting so badly to knock on the door. To sit with her. He needed to feel less alone and this was always the place he went to for that.
     
    Her light was on. Was she still up? He wondered if she'd sat there crying over Dan after they left. Then he felt the twinge of guilt for being outside the house in the middle of the night. More guilt passed through him for comforting himself