Hide Away Read Free Page B

didn’t think so either,” Joe said. “We did everything right. Or maybe we didn’t. But I don’t know how we could have done anything different.” He shook his head. “I’m a little confused on that point at the moment.”
    â€œMe, too.” She met his gaze. “I … feel lost. I can’t quite grasp it.” She reached up and ran a hand through her hair. “How … long?”
    â€œBarely. A few weeks. You must have conceived before we left the Lake Cottage to come out here to California.”
    â€œI remember when I was pregnant with Bonnie, I didn’t know for months.”
    â€œThings have changed since you were sixteen. They can tell within five or six days now.”
    She nodded. “The whole world has changed. My whole life has changed. I’m not the same person.”
    â€œYes, you are. You’ve just been tempered by experience.” He lifted her palm to his lips. “And this particular experience may do some more very intricate tempering. Just don’t let it throw you. We’ll think about it, then make decisions.”
    â€œDecisions.” No, she couldn’t make decisions right now. Her head was whirling, and all she could think about was the fact that in nine months she would bear a child. It was impossible. No, it was going to happen. “How do you feel about it?”
    â€œAs dazed as you.” He grinned. “Kind of … primitive. I’ve never fathered a child of my own. I suppose that’s a natural reaction. I … like it.” His smile faded. “I never suggested it to you. After all you’ve gone through, I thought that it had to come from you. I know what you went through when you lost your Bonnie; when she was killed. After we adopted Jane, I believed that might be the way we should go.”
    â€œSo did I.” She moistened her lips. “And now I’m wondering why we never talked about having a child of our own. Did I just bury my head in the sand? My God, Joe, I must have sensed you’d feel like this. Was I so afraid that I avoided facing it?”
    He didn’t answer.
    Because he knew it was true, she realized. She was his center, and he wouldn’t allow her to be hurt even if it meant being cheated himself. “You should have spoken to me about it.”
    He shook his head. “I have you. That’s enough, more than enough.” He leaned forward and kissed her. “Now stop fretting about me, you have thinking to do.”
    â€œThinking,” she repeated. “You said decision. You know I won’t have an abortion. I couldn’t do that.”
    â€œThat’s not what I meant. You told me once that you’d intended to adopt Bonnie out to a good home before she was born. Then, when you saw her, you changed your mind.”
    Eve stared at him in shock. “You’d consent to me doing that?”
    â€œI have no idea. I doubt it. Every instinct is shouting no, but I just had to bring it up because you’d once considered it. You were a teenager then, poor, virtually alone, and Bonnie was illegitimate. Now you’re older, but you have a career that obsesses you, and family would get in the way.” He met her gaze. “Whatever your decision, it has to be made with your whole heart. After that, we’ll work out what we need to do individually to meet both our own goals. We’ll find a way to blend them together.”
    â€œJoe…”
    â€œHush.” He squeezed her hand before releasing it. “I’m going to go and see about your release papers. You rest awhile, then I’ll send Margaret in to help you dress.” He paused. “Do you want me to tell her?”
    She shook her head. “It’s not real to me yet. How can I make it real to anyone else?”
    â€œWhat about Cara? Do you still want to take her into our home for a while?”
    â€œOf course I do. What are we