Fun With Problems Read Free

asked.
    "That's right. I don't go for that kind of stuff."
    "It's a therapeutic device," the young woman said. "The cards help them to talk about themselves." She turned for support to Matthews, who had been observing her. "It relaxes them."
    Matthews thought her voice sounded local; her background was probably fairly humble, otherwise her family would have invested in some improving orthodontics for such a basically pretty girl.
    "Maybe she's got something there," he told Sister Sophia, although he saw little point in making Brand crazier than he already was.
    The lippy nun looked at Matthews for a moment and turned back to the psychologist.
    "That stuff is diabolical superstition," she declared. "It stands between the soul and Higher Power." The gray cat came back through the metal door to listen like a familiar. Unchallenged, the nun grew triumphalist. "Ha! Here she is," she said, nodding toward the psychologist, "supposed to be helping these kids!" She looked up and down the visiting area as though in search of a larger audience. "Tarot cards!" she cried. "Phooey!"

    An elderly prisoner with a push broom came out behind the cat.
    "We're fucking entitled," the old man said.
    "You just watch your language, Bobby," a passing guard told him.
    The young woman blushed. "They
are
entitled," she said. "They're entitled to any kind of therapy. And it does not interfere with Higher Power. Insight promotes it." The psychologist was pointing at the crucifix that still stood on the edge of the altar at the near end of the room. "What if I say that's superstition?" Addressing Matthews now, she startled the cat. "I bet it's unconstitutional. I mean, where's the wall of separation?"
    "Well," Sister said, outraged and gesturing at the psychologist's cards, "I better not find any of these magic doozies around the plant, because I'll get 'em lifted."
    "I'm sure you can do that, Sister," the red-headed psychologist said. "You serve the county instead of the inmates. You're a snitch."
    Everyone was horrified.
    "Did you hear her?" Sister Sophia asked the men. "Did you hear what she called me?"
    In fact, it was generally believed that Sister Sophia—though a good enough egg in her own way—had her own interpretations of the unwritten laws. And that there were certain things better left uncommitted to her discretion.

    "Maybe you should apologize to Sister Sophia," the hack said. "Ya went too far there."
    "Heat of argument," Matthews said.
    Sister Sophia gathered up the cat and fixed them each in turn with a dreadful wounded stare. She was a person completely of the jail, and the accusation was a mortal one. Matthews wondered how well the psychologist understood this. She seemed not to have been around for very long.
    Lights flashed. The amplified voice of the administration declared visitations concluded. The hack urged them out.
    "Let's go home, folks."
    Sister Sophia and Jackie, padding underfoot, retreated up the stone passageway.
    "After thirty years!" Sister Sophia said, following the big neutered tom up the dank stone hallway. "Thirty years in this crummy joint!"
    "Just a misunderstanding," Matthews said to the young woman. He extended a hand. "Pete Matthews." Her name was Amy Littlefield.
    They lingered in the severe dark-wood reception room.
    "You know," Matthews said, "your guy is threatening my client."
    "Oh," she said. "He's always boasting. He told me the test of a tough guy was to break someone's fingers." A guilty smile appeared on her face and faded immediately. "He's trying in his way to impress me."
    On Water Street, outside the jail, it was cold and cheerless. Fine hail rattled against the streetlights and the steps of the jail.

    "Impressed?"
    "He needs to take his antipsychotics. He doesn't belong in there. I mean," she said, "what can you do?"
    "I was wondering that. I'm worried about Georgie."
    "Really? Your client looks tough."
    "No," Matthews explained. "No. The last time he was in there," Matthews said, "he was