Flicker Read Free Page A

allowing a small
smile to creep over my face, but it vanishes when I look up and see
Cameron watching me. Seeing his clenched jaw and narrowed eyes
reminds me of my conversation with Robbie and I'm filled with a
heavy feeling of guilt.
     
    *****
     
    Driving home after school I can't help but
replay what Robbie said. I know people started saying shit about me
after I dumped Alex a couple months ago, but it's not because I
don't like them. It's totally the opposite. If they get too
close…
    My fingers tingle. I flex them against the
steering wheel, but it's too late to stop it. The rhythmic pulse of
light floods through the drivers' side window. My reflex is to
close my eyes but I can't keep them shut.
    The tingling moves up my hands, delicate
pinpricks that increase in intensity until the sensation races up
my arms and slams into my chest. The familiar heaviness pushes me
against the seat and I fight the urge to stare into the light. The
test wasn't that bad. I can deal with failing. It's reliving that
conversation with Robbie that I'd rather avoid.
    I reach for my sunglasses in the passenger
seat but it's too late.
    With a final push the heaviness lifts and
I'm floating, barely able to hang on to the steering wheel. I take
a deep breath and—
    — I'm in yesterday's English class. A
couple people look at me from the corner of their eye but no one
says anything. When I come to after flickering, I spasm like when
you dream that you're falling. Sometimes I do it on purpose when
I'm not flickering. I figure the more people think I'm just mildly
weird, the less likely they are to know how weird I really
am.
     
     

Chapter 4
     
     
     
    One of the down sides of flickering is
reliving things I'd rather not repeat. Like the safety assembly
with Stride Right. It was bad enough the first time, having to
watch him strut around like he's all important, but listening to
him a second time is unbearable.
    I focus on a piece of hair dangling from the
collar of the girl in front of me. It flutters in a breeze I can't
feel, then drifts to the darkness at my feet.
    While I'm staring at the floor a sense
of dread sneaks up on me. I lean my head back on the seat and close
my eyes. How can I do it better this
time?
    "Common sense will save you in most
situations. Unfortunately," the cop chuckles, "not a lot of you
have any common sense, so that's why I'm here."
    Oh good, it's almost over.
    The same hushed whispers pass through the
auditorium after the cop leaves the stage. I want nothing more than
to sneak out the back door, but I spot Cameron ahead of me, walking
alone, the other kids moving around him like they’re afraid to get
too close. If he can face the entire school and the things they say
about him, I can deal with one boy.
    Robbie’s at my locker. "I texted you last
night…"
    This time I stop the lie before it can form,
but the hurt is still in his eyes. "Robbie, I think we need to
talk."
    His eyes dart to my locker, then down at our
feet.
    Words won't come.
    He looks up. "You don't want to see me
anymore?"
    Huh? My brows crinkle and my heart
drops to my stomach. How did he know
that?
    "You've been acting different the past
couple weeks. That's why I wanted to talk to you last night."
    "It is?" Don't tell me he wanted to break up
with me.
    He toes the ground with his sneaker and
leans against the locker. "There's no point dragging this out if
you aren't feeling it. Besides, I knew what people said about you
before we started going out."
    I really can't escape my reputation.
    "You're a great guy and all but—"
    "Don't go there." He leans close but his
dark eyes don't have the same coldness they did last time. "I just
wish you'd had the balls to say something when you decided we were
over."
    "What do you mean?" I mean, I know what he
means, but how could he know that's how I felt?
    "You walk around like you've got some secret
you don't want to share. I thought that maybe when we started
dating you'd let me in, but I don't know